Freaky Friday: Halloween Edition 2009

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

So, I was recently discussing with some friends why women assume it's okay to dress like a dirtywhoreskank on Halloween. I am terrified for my daughter to become a teenager, asking me if she can dress up as a sexy taxi driver or something for All Hallow's Eve. So, in celebration of the trashtasticness that is Halloween, I give you sexy costumes that should not be sexy at all, many of them found at Yandy.com.


K, lets be honest here. This "Sexy Eskimo" costume is basically a glorified hoodie without pants. Save yourself $50 and just wear your hubby's school sweater. PS in Canada, "eskimo" is a fairly derogatory term. Just sayin.



Ooh! A sexy chef! Because when I think of a good filet mignon, I also think of short skirts and boobs. Fantastique!



This one was listed as a sexy nutcracker. Why yes, she does look like she cracks.... nuts....



Sexy Spongebob makes baby Jesus cry.



I was actually joking about the sexy taxi driver, but then I actually found one. Where I'm from, all of the taxi drivers are bald, wear denim shirts and smell slightly of tobacco and curry. So no, I have never met one of these sexy taxi drivers.



This one made me laugh the hardest. It was labeled as a "Sexy RED BULL Drinker" Like OH MY GOSH. If you want to show up to a party wearing your lingerie, just do it. Stop trying to make it into a costume. Show up naked for all I care. Then call yourself a sexy doctor. Because that's about how relevant this costume is.


A sexy skeleton. Clearly just an excuse to show off that hot PELVIC BONE!!!



So THIS is why Eve got kicked out of the Garden of Eden. Prostitution.



Let's alienate some more cultures by making them into sex kitten-ish Halloween costumes. You don't mind that, Native Americans, do you?



Sexy Nemo. NEMO. Because when I think of sex, I think of adolescent clown fish? WHERE AM I???

Now that I officially hate the holiday, I'm going to get into my stressed out mom costume and take my kids trick or treating.



This is my stressed out mom costume.

You like?

9 comments:

Joy said...

I completely agree! I saw a sexy nun costume last night!

Shirley said...

I love your blog! I found it two weeks ago and it is awesome!

I totally agree with everything you just said. I hate that it's an excuse to show off your body. At least all the models in your pictures had bodies to show off. I had to see pictures of my friend on facebook with all of her friends in their sexy costumes that they were about 50 pounds too heavy for. Geesh!

Char @ Crap I've Made said...

My sister's going as a gold digger this year. Like this:

http://www.amazon.com/Gold-Digger-Hat-Small-Costume/dp/B002KV3S0Q/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=apparel&qid=1256941682&sr=8-3

Diamond said...

I couldn't agree more! What is extra scary; it's not just the teens that are getting these, not just the pre-teens, but even a lot of little girl costumes are trying to be sexy.

Anna@Exasperation said...

Now, off to pour straight clorox into my eyes...

Lisa B said...

Didn't you know Jae, "Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it".

Shop Girl* said...

The sexy Nemo seriously hurts my heart. What are these girls thinking?!?

House of Tong said...

You are hilarious!!! xoxoxo

Unknown said...

It really looks hots. For more sexy dresses also visit at http://uniqueandlovely.com.

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