Transitioning into Fall and Winter

This a repost from last year. I started to write another post about transitioning summer wear and I was like wait, didn't I already do this? It's just been one of those days where I had like, three minutes to get dressed and out the door because I overdosed on NyQuil, then totally slept in and my family is in town visiting and I'm all over the place. Don't you love days like that? So when I sat down to blog I basically started writing this one again. My brain hurts.

So I'm reposting as a reminder! Keep your maxi dresses in rotation please!

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We've discussed how much I enjoy colder weather because it means a few things to me: Holidays, cute boots and LAYERING. Oh how I love to layer. It creates interest and dimension to outfits that I just can't achieve with the t-shirts and flip flops of summer.

Of course, all summer long I expounded upon the importance of things like maxi dresses, casual dresses and skirts. If you were good followers, you listened and rushed out and invested in all things girly. But now it's getting cold, what the heck do you do with them?

Never fear! I have ideas for transitioning your wardrobe into winter and fall. I am NOT the kind of girl who puts away her summer clothes and rotates out her closet. Every piece is fair game around here, and if you're not a bazillionaire you probably just need to make it work with the clothing you already have.

Your Maxi Dress:

Oasis Feather Print Maxi Dress, Multicoloured, 15 GBP
AE Women's Denim Jacket (Authentic Medium Wash), $50
Miss Me Women's Monet-16A Studded Ankle Boot, $50
East West Messenger, $48
Java Marble Resin Bangle Set, 12 GBP

All summer long I wandered around in my maxi dress and flip flops or flats. I still love them all to death. But now that it's cold, it's time to make it look less summery and more serious. Adding a jacket up top instantly adds more credibility. I've worn my cropped jean jacket and my leather jacket with max dresses and it was so cute. I also love a pair of slouchy boots or moccasins. You can be a little flowery childish with a maxi dress. Add a winter bag and no one will even notice it's the same dress you wore to the beach.

Your Casual Skirt

Velvet Bow Pocket Cardi, 27 GBP
Old Navy Womens Ruffle-Hem Skirts, $25
Put On a Bow Tights, $14
Forever21.com - Shoes - Dressy - 2080953702, $25
Padlock Shoulder Bag, $48
Fancy Beaded Headband, $6.80

You can totally get away with wearing the cute skirt you wore with flats all summer for a more formal event if you dress it properly. Tights, tights, tights are a must to bring your skirts current. Patterns over colors, whatever. You cannot go wrong, unless they have weird patterns on them... like bats. Stay away from bats. Bows? Totally adorbs! Dress it up with a little sweater and you have an Emma Pillsbury way to dress up even casual fabrics and fit.

Your Skinny Jeans / Dare I Say It? JEGGINGS.

Old Navy Womens Fair Isle Tie-Belt Wrap Cardigans, $40
Women's Skinny Jean - American Eagle Outfitters, $40
Slouchy Mid-Calf Boots w/ Buckles, $40
Off White Round Handbag, $33
BKE Marbled Hoop Earring, $2.55
Lucky Brand Ojai Ring, $26

So I love a skinny jean with a t-shirt, flat and summer scarf, but come winter, it's going to look too summer casual. Luckily, awesome sweaters can help balance out your top half while keeping you warm and fashionable. Look for sweaters that accentuate the waist so you don't get lost in all that yarn. And slouchy boots are a must, especially if you're wearing the J-word. I don't want to see your ankles in the winter. They look cold and lonely.

Your Summer Dress

binding floral bandeau dress, 18 GBP
Let It Be Me Blazer, 140 AUD
Black Faux Suede Ruffled Lace Back Knee High Flat Boots @ Amiclubwear..., $26
Multi Ruffle Handbag 172949100 | handbags & wallets | Tillys.com, $22
Silver Flower Stud Earrings, $18
Black double wrap waist belt, 8 GBP

So if you have a dress that has a very summery pattern, you can tone it down by pairing it with plenty of black and heavier accessories. After a back blazer, boots and bag, the red and white of this dress becomes a pretty accent, rather than the main event. Plus the boots and jacket can help keep you warm while everyone else is shivering in last season's dresses. My, aren't we smug?
Don't worry about running out and buying new clothes, especially if you don't have the cash for them. Work with what you have and add pieces and accessories to make it look like they were made for fall. It's okay, I won't tell a soul.

Swimsuitphobia

Hey guys --- I'm off and running on my two-week long adventure of tearing my hair out, but since I'll be squeezing into a swimsuit this weekend, I thought this was a good reminder for all of us!

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Have I ever told you guys that I'm terrified of birds? No? OK, I'm telling you now. I hate them. There's something about the way they dart around erratically that makes me nervous. I hate any type of insect or animal that is erratic. Moths make me dry heave.

But do you know what's scarier than birds? Trying on swimsuits, amiright? And it's not like I'm the only one. I think the idea of baring your body to the general public makes nearly every woman break into a cold sweat. Want to know why?


This.

Remember when Jessica Biel did this spread for GQ or Maxim or whatever it was, and everyone was like OMG SHE HAS THE PERFECT BODY!?

I do. I believe she started dating Justin Timberlake shortly after this. Considering her claim to fame was "7th Heaven," it's proof that a magazine spread can do amazing things for your career.

ANYWAY. That picture is exactly what's wrong with every other woman on the planet come June. We have to go to stores with terrible lighting and squeeze into swimsuits made for supermodels and then NOT look like supermodels and then contemplate a liquid diet. It's pretty much the worst ever.

So the other day I finally decided to man up and go swimsuit shopping. I took my kids, loaded my iPhone with movies and took a deep breath. I've been at the gym at least three or four times a week for the past month, so I figured I wouldn't be too horrified with the results. I headed to the store and surveyed the goods. I chose six and disappeared into the fitting rooms. I put "Megamind" on my phone for the kids and started the process.

And wouldn't you know it? I DIDN'T LOOK LIKE JESSICA BIEL.

Now, let's get something straight. Even Jessica Biel doesn't look like Jessica Biel. That is called Photoshop. But I didn't even look like unphotoshopped Jessica. You know who I looked like? Myself.

Me who has carried and delivered three babies. Me who struggles out of bed at 6:30 am every morning to get to the gym to be tortured during Pilates. Me who never says no to butter on her popcorn. Me who can still do cartwheels on the front lawn, much to my husband's chagrin.

So while I stood there in an ill-lit fitting room with two kids and an armful of swimsuits that would not make me look like a supermodel, I felt my attitude soften toward my body in general. It's never going to look like Jessica Biel's. Ever. She has never had kids and therefore has hours per day to work with a personal trainer. And that's totally fine for her. More power to her! But it doesn't mean that I can mope around and feel sorry for myself because I can only squeeze in an hour per day. (However, I do feel sorry for myself that I'm not dating Justin Timberlake. It's a hard knock life, my friend.)

In fact, it put me in an annoyed mindset. I'm annoyed that women have to constantly feel apologetic that they look like THEMSELVES. "Um, sorry for my big thighs and my weird calves and belly pooch." Yesterday I caught myself complaining to my friend about my ribs. MY RIBS. WHO complains about that? It's so "Mean Girls."

I propose that we all get over our crazy swimsuit phobias. I know it's scary to put on very small pieces of stretchy fabric and not look like a Victoria's Secret model, but who cares? Everyone at the beach/pool/lake is so worried about ensuring that the light hits their abs so you can't see their stretch marks that they don't even notice what you're wearing. Unless you're shlubbing around a pool in a T-shirt and shorts. I always notice that. It's like a lighted sign that says "I HATE MY BODY." With a frowny face. Instead, find a suit that you love and that makes you feel good about yourself and stop apologizing. You look fine and maybe even a little confident. My swimsuit-buying advice? Suck it up and stop sucking it in.

You want to know what I bought? A swimsuit with a ruffled top and gold buttons and hardware. I totally wore it boating, despite the fact that my ribs are weird.

Great Lengths

Sometimes it's amazing what I spend time thinking about. Like when I have deep thoughts about the length of pants. But with legitimate warm weather starting like, two weeks ago, comes the return of the capri pant.

Now, my hatred for capris is well documented with a highly controversial post. But I'd like to point out that my hatred for said isn't just a whim, it's just because they're so darn unflattering. I saw a comment on another blog about that post and it said "She's just writing that because she doesn't look good in capris." NO! I don't! I'm 5'4" and capris make me look about two feet shorter. I can't afford that.

I don't care if your calves are like toothpicks (and mine are not) capris just widen things out. That's because a true capri pant cuts across the widest part of your calf, stopping your leg short. The result? Short legs, wide calves. I know, it's enticing.

HOWEVER, as much as I eschew capris, I'm not opposed to a pair of Bermudas or a cropped pant.

"But JAE!" You shout at your computer. "How am I supposed to know the difference!?" Calm down. Don't alarm the neighbors. I shall tell you!



These are capris. See how they end right across where the calf is the widest? No bueno. They make the leg look stumpy.


These are crops. See how the pant stops at the slimmest part of the ankle instead? YAY! They make the leg look way slimmer. And SO cute with flats!


Ew.


Here are a pair of true Bermudas. I LOVE THEM. The best part about Bermies is that you can style them like you do a skirt. I love to wear mine with wedges and a dressier top for nighttime in the summer. And, since they stop anywhere between mid-thigh and the knee, you get nice, long line from knee to ankle for super slimming power.


Boo.


These are a capri-bermuda hybrid I found on Pinterest and they totally work. That's because they're cuffed right before the calf starts. Super cute AND an awesome way to make your capris into a more flattering length. See? You don't have to burn them! This with a low wedge and a tee for summer? Perfect.


If you want to give cuffing a shot, here's a perfect example of how to. Take a regular pair of skinny jeans and turn the bottoms up once or twice. They don't have to be perfectly neat. I like to do this when I really want to show off my shoes. If I had these shoes, I would probably just wear them everywhere.

I feel like that should open up your summer options a bit. By all means, show a little leg now that it's warm; just make sure it's the right part of your leg. Length is kind of a big deal when it comes to shorts and crops.

Do you still hate me for hating capris? I promise I have entirely honorable intentions. I just want to eradicate the world of stumpiness... is that so wrong?

All Dressed Up and Nowhere to Go

One complaint I often hear from moms is that they have nowhere to wear all the cute things posted on fashion blogs. I mean, really! When you're hauling diapers around, the clutch doesn't really have a place in your life. I can totally understand that. My husband bought me a gorgeous little designer handbag right before I had my first baby and I only got to carry it for like, a month before it was honkin' huge bag time.

Now, I'm sure you already know that I don't like this kind of thinking. It's like only eating fish sticks for a week yourself because that's all your picky two-year-old will eat. I think that stepping it up appearance-wise can make a big difference in how you carry yourself and how you feel.

But how can you make trendier, cuter stuff part of your daily repertoire? I'll tell you right now, it's going to freak some people out. When I started wearing dresses casually like, four years ago, people would always ask me why I was "so dressed up." And I'll admit, it annoyed me to death -- like, is anything but jeans considered "dressed up?" But after a while, people got used to it and I don't hear a peep.

Yes, it's hard to transition and it's a little embarrassing when people make a big deal about your wearing flats instead of sneakers, but it's all for a good cause, right?

Instead of sticking with the same old because you don't really have anywhere to wear something new, MAKE UP A REASON.

Check it out:

Halter neck top, $30
Lauren Conrad slim fit jeans, $35
Michael Antonio white heels, $50
Clutch handbag, $40
Stella dot jewelry, $44
Forever 21 antique rhinestone jewelry, $6.80

Seriously, one of the first things I do when I buy a new jacket or pair of shoes is snag a babysitter and tell my hubs we're going out for a night. Yes, I could go to the movies in a hoodie and sneaks, but it's way more fun to bust out the leopard print heels for a date, even if it's just to the cheap theater (which, in most cases for us, it is).

H m blazer, £25
H&M slim fit pants, £25
Black Paisley Border Top, £15
Wet Seal wedge heels, $22
Magid straw clutch, $50
Chandelier earrings, $20

Or how about a girl's night? I love to go for lunch or din-dins with my friends and wear some of my better stuff that doesn't get much play on a daily basis. I wore my yellow skinnies out to a friend's birthday lunch on Monday and I'm telling you now, women can appreciate colored jeans more than a man ever could.

Old Navy striped shirt, $17
Miss Selfridge skirt, $26
Blowfish ballerina flat, $40
Quiksilver beach tote bag, $33
Miss Selfridge cotton scarve, $25
H&M retro sunglasses, £4.99
Wet Seal beaded belt, $11

Even hanging out with your kids on a trip to the museum gives you a chance to bust out your new scarf or wear a preppy cardigan instead of the same old stuff.

All I'm saying is that you shouldn't be waiting for an invitation to the Oscars to get a little dressed up every now and again. For one, it's probably not going to happen, and if it does, you'll end up wearing Spanx.

NOT FUN.

Instead of biting your lip and relegating cute clothes to the back of your closet, bust 'em out and make 'em work for whatever you're doing. I cannot tell you how much of a difference it makes. I'm not even kidding. Yesterday I did laundry and mopped floors in a maxi skirt. I'd be lying if I said I didn't spin around a little and pretend I was Cinderella. I'm only human. Regardless, I didn't have to avoid my own reflection when I cleaned the mirrors, which is totally what happens when I'm hanging around the house in my husband's basketball shorts and that hoodie I have with inexplicable burn marks. I just can't bring myself to throw it out.

Anyway, I give you a challenge to find an "occasion" where you can get dressed up this week. Hey, I'm not talking stilettos and a cocktail dress to your kid's field trip, I'm talking lunch with the girls, an impromptu outing with your kidlets, or to surprise your significant other for lunch at work. Not only will it inspire you to wear some of the more special pieces in your closet, but it's FUN.

Will you promise? Dooooooooo it. Peeeeeer pressure!

4 Things That Make You Look Fat

Ooh, that's a harsh title, right? I KNOW. It's shock value. I'm so shocking.

But seriously, I want to take a minute to talk about a few habits that make you look chubbier than you really are. First, can we say that I really hate serious self-deprecation? Like, joking that you're a terrible cook is one thing. I'm a terrible cook. But whining that you look fat is another thing altogether. I feel like it's just asking for the sympathy vote and I don't like it.

You are the way you are. If you don't like it, change it. If you don't feel like changing it, learn to live with it.

But body types and weight aside, there are things I see women do ALL THE TIME that make them look fat. Seriously, a Victoria's Secret model would look paunchy if she broke some of these rules. Because size is really all relative, it's worth it to check if you're guilty of some of these sins. That way, you can look skinnier without hitting the gym (and I mean that. Yesterday was "personal best" day at the gym, where you're supposed to push yourself harder than before. I woke up to cement legs this morning. Ouch.)

1) Wearing Clothes that Don't Fit

Whether it's too big or too small, it makes you look fat. Clothes make a huge difference in the way your body looks, period. I am one of those people who is way heavier than she looks. Which is exactly the reason I haven't weighed myself in three years.

Is there anything worse than seeing someone stuff herself sausage-style into way-small clothes? Yes. Seeing someone shlub around in clothes that are way too big. They're equal offenders. That's why you should always try clothes on, tailor them if necessary and use stuff like belts or cardigans to help define your look. Who cares about the actual size? I'm concerned about the fit. You can look svelte at size 6 or 16 as long as your clothes actually fit your body.

2) Wearing the Wrong Pattern

OK, here's where it gets dicey. Patterns are awesome. But patterns can also make you look fat. Some serious zero in on your trouble areas, like HERE I AM. I have a shirt that I really love, but the pattern makes me look like I just ate Thanksgiving dinner. Not cool. Try on clothes and make sure the pattern detracts. That's why I love abstract patterns. Geometric and uniform patterns can make you look chubby when they don't lay completely right.

Also, look for patterns that are proportional to your body. If you carry some extra weight and you wear a teeny pattern, it looks like there's this vast amount of polka dots or whatever. Look for a mid-sized pattern instead and you'll look way slimmer.

3) Slouching

Yeah, your mom was right. Oh, this one really gets on my nerves. Probably because I'm inexplicably proud of my posture. It's like I went to one of those old timey schools where they made you walk with a book on your head -- but I didn't. I just know that slouching makes you look fat and paunchy. Seriously. How about you tuck your shoulders back and straighten up. Stop walking around like you want to be invisible. Standing up straight is like, a 1 second diet. You'll look skinnier and like you're actually happy to be alive. Win!

4) Crappy Accessories

You know I love me some accessories, right? They are the way to make an outfit look on-purpose. But they can also make you look fat if they emphasize the wrong areas of your body. Ask me why I never where those full finger rings. Go ahead, ask me!! It's because I have stubby child hands and they make me look like a weirdo. Cocktail rings are much better on me. Same goes with dicey accessories that are hard to pull off, like a choker. Instead, look for accessories that lengthen: a drop pair of earrings, a long scarf, some layered necklaces. They'll make the eye look up and down rather than side to side. Yay!

SO yeah, you can totally look slimmer without a huge Biggest Loser weight overhaul. I mean, that would be super cool, but most of us don't need to lose 200 lbs, just perk up a bit.

Fess up: Are you guilty of any of these?

Vintage HNTDLAM: Natural Cures for SCFD - Seasonal Crappy Fashion Disorder

Wow, my blog does not work well with acronyms.

I know I put this post up every year around the end of January and beginning of February and for good reason. I'm in the fashion doldrums, you guys. Although, my hubs did take me shopping last night for Valentine's and I got the ca-yootest nautical polka dot shirt and some other stuff that is making me happy. But today, I shall be working and cleaning and getting ready for a birthday party, so it's kind of the perfect day to slough off and repost my yearly reminder to stop dressing crappily just because it's wintertime. Other reasons?

1) It has been dreary and foggy here for the last couple of days and I need something colorful to brighten things up. Speaking of which, did you know I was voted "Most Likely to Brighten Your Day" of my graduating class? I kid you not. I'm a frickin' ray of sunshine. I cannot be contained by crappy February days!!

2) Honestly, February SUCKS for me. With V-Day and both my kids' birthdays all in a row plus some random meetings I need to get to, I can barely keep my head on straight, which means posting has to take a back seat until I can somehow conjure a Lightning McQueen cake. WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF?

3) I have a lot more readers this year and I don't want you newbies missing out on valuable wisdom and pretty accessories.

Since this post still applies, I thought it was worth it to reiterate the fact that winter doesn't have to be all Blandsville and Lamestown. While I certainly love a wool skirt, I'll love it even more with a print top.

You guys aren't mad at me for reposting are you? I updated it for this year, so even if you've read it before, take a gander and get with the program again. I swear I'll make it up to you with Freaky Friday, mmmkay?



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One thing that you should know about me, other than the fact that I constantly, incorrectly use the words "scratch" and "itch" interchangeably, is that I LOVE WINTER. I grew up in the Great White North, and was conditioned to sub zero temperatures, and now that I live somewhere snowy and mild, I find it delightful.

You don't even understand when I explain the coldness that was Toronto. Only those that live there, have moved away, and come back really realize how bone chillingly, nostril freezing, stay in bed with an electric blanket cold it is up there. Now when I go home to visit, I wonder how I ever survived. And my parents made me WALK to school. Uphill both ways. True story. NO really.

So while I love winter where I live, the snow, the not-too-cold cold and the opportunity to drink a lot of two packet hot chocolate, there is one thing I don't love. In the words of Tyra Banks, I feel like it is an epidemic sweeping the nation.

SCFD - Seasonal Crappy Fashion Disorder.

Those suffering from SCFD may experience the following symptoms: Wearing the same clothes too often because they're "comfortable", stepping outside of the house in sweats at 3pm, wearing parkas ALL THE TIME, and looking unkempt, not put together, and altogether sad.

Luckily, you don't have to visit your doctor to find the cure for SCFD. I offer it free. Which is really, really nice of me when you think of it. Co-pays are high.

To battle SCFD, use bright colors to add to your neutrals to brighten up your clothes and your outlook.


Take one bright, basic green belt from Buckle, and wrap it around a khaki skirt or trench coat to add a pop of color.


Use a yellow trench and wear over all neutrals to spread general SCFD cheer. (PS Plus sized girls, this one is for you!) I totally have a yellow trench and have challenged myself to wear it with red heels in the next week or so. KABLOW!



Sub a soft, orange Michal Kors hobo for your usual structured, basic bag. I'm carrying a black bag right now, but this is inspiring me to dig out my teal bag for funsies.


Grab a pair of red heels that are totally appropriate for winter (Unless you're walking to work! Then use flats or boots.) Wear with all of your black and gray winter staples.



Bring some color to your pale face with a freakin' adorable headband by Charlotte Russe. Bahh I might be buying this I love it so much.



Finish off with a winter-y warm, but still bright and adorable scarf from PacSun.

Prescription directions: Don't go all crazy and wear all of these items at once. You'll look a) crazy and unbalanced or b) like a gay pride parade barfed on you. Choose one at time. Wear with neutrals and all of the outfits you've been wearing all winter long; sweaters, jeans, heavier skirts and slacks. Feel free to share your prescription with others. Seeing people looking drab and boring in the winter makes me want to curl up, watch Titanic and cry. Remember that you don't need to pull out all of your spring wardrobe now, as it is still frigid in most parts of the country.

Do not mix items with puffy hoodies, parkas or moon boots, as the combination will dilute the cuteness of the bright accessories, and SCFD may resume.

Side effects may include: Jae being very happy that people aren't wearing gray anymore, compliments from husband, and a feeling of admiration from the general public, and very rarely, an empty wallet. Empty wallet only occurs when you don't know how to shop properly. Adjust your shopping techniques.

Consult a retail store if SCFD doesn't improve with the addition of better fashion. You might need me to yell at you and say things like, "Oh heading to another funeral, are we?" Because I totally will behind your back.

How to: Find Your Style

A question I get a lot is how to figure out one's style and then how to make it work so one looks super awesome and hot all the time.

I mean, not in so many words, but that's basically the gist of that question.

Seriously, I think when you're clueless about fashion and style, the idea of heading into a store and looking through racks is actually torturous. You look at the cute people around you and feel intimidated by retail people and generally want to kill yourself. I know because I totally used to be one of those people. I mean, it was a long time ago and I've since recovered and maybe even overcompensated a little, but I feel your pain anyway.

If the idea of shopping makes your palms sweat and your gag reflex kick in, I can only deduce that you have one of two problems: 1) You aren't happy with your body. Or, 2) you don't know what you want.

Both problems suck. If it's the first, might I suggest you get over it immediately? I don't care if you're a size 2 or 20, you have the right to feel good about yourself and that's NOT going to happen in your husband's workout shorts and your ratty old band shirt, OK? And saying that you're not going to shop until you "lose weight" is just going to sabotage your efforts. Because you then feel crappy about yourself and don't feel like you deserve to look pretty and then eat your weight in Chick-Fil-A I KNOW, OK.

That felt good.

If it's the second option that has you running scared, might I suggest a few tips? Look, the average person is not so clueless that they need a complete What Not to Wear-esque wardrobe overhaul, OK? So that means you probably have a personal style tucked away there somewhere, you just need to find it. Get thee to thy closet! I promise you that you can find your style tucked among the comfort clothes stashed in there.

Take a minute to think about your daily activities and how you feel you need to dress. Look inside your closet and see what types of styles you're drawn to. Page through a magazine and see which celebs you love the most. Pull up Pinterest and click through outfits.

Chances are, you'll find a common thread in all of them. Whether you're into a low key cardi and jeans look or you're a sucker for leather (ahem) you can start to piece together a personal style. If that idea still terrifies you, let's start with some baby steps, k?

Accessories


(J. Crew)

Accessories are my favorite because they're cheap and not committal (if I were a funny female comic I'd be like "HA! Like my last boyfriend." But I'm married to my last boyfriend and that wouldn't be nice. ) You can try them out without having to feel bad because you dropped major dough on them. If you want to try out a new style -- say, easy but stylish -- buy a $5 scarf and try it out in a few different ways. If you love it, buy more. If not, give it to a friend and she'll love you.

Add Color


(Old Navy)

So, you're obsessed with a certain piece of clothing -- let's say maxi skirts. I love maxi skirts, but they can look really dowdy and Little House on the Prairie if you're not careful. But updating old faves with new colors, you can test the waters of a new trend (neon colors, hello!) without making a big deal about it. Two points if you wear maxis for casual wear!

New Shoes

(Zara)

New shoes are like getting a haircut or color. They just make you feel happy inside. Or at least, that's how I react and why my closet is so out of control. But seriously, you can try a new style on your feet, can't you? They take up like, 2 percent of your body so it shouldn't be that big of a deal. If you love a new trend, like animal print, try it first on your feet to see if you like it before you look for a bigger piece (I just ordered a snakeskin tank and I am d-y-i-n-g for it to get here!)

Cute Topper


(Tillys -OMG the studs!!!)

Guess what? I don't have $5000 for a new wardrobe and I bet you don't either. If you do, can we go splitsies? But seriously? Your style is probably already in your closet, it just needs to be seriously updated. Adding cute toppers like a boyfriend cardigan or a streamlined blazer can make your clothes look new and help you refine your style. Even if you tend to be a tee and jeans girl during the week, adding a blazer over that tee, a statement necklace and a pair of heels gives a whole new look for date night. Easy peezy, my friends. Easy peezy.

So what do you say? Are you willing to at least try to find your personal style? I'm totally not offended if you don't like Frye boots and sky high heels like me. Work with what you have and do some closet-tweaking and you'll probably find that you already have a foundation in place that works for you and your lifestyle.

And as an added bonus, I won't judge you as a mom jeans wearer.

An Attitude of Gratitude

So, even though I'm Canadian and Thanksgiving was last month, we didn't get to celebrate it because it was crazy busy in these parts and so I resolved to celebrate extra hard for American Thanksgiving. Also, a couple nights ago I badgered my mom into having a pseudo Christmas dinner when I'm back home in a couple of weeks, so the turkey ratio totally checks out! YES!

Anyway, I thought I'd talk about some of the things that I'm thankful for. I am aware that Thanksgiving is next week, but next week we'll talk outfits and then I'll be all preoccupied for Black Friday, so today is better.

Just so you know, I AM grateful for friends, family, my house, blah blah blah. But I am also thankful for shiny and pretty things, which is what this post is dedicated to. Ah, shopping!

Without further ado:

Jae's List of Pretty Things She's Thankful For

I'm thankful for: Leather jackets. I think, by now, we understand that they are my weakness, yes? This one from Debenham's is well-cut and the brown is gorgeous. Really. I must have. Add it to the collection.


Pretty bags that are large enough to get my wallet, lip balms, wipes case, spare diaper, two pairs of sunglasses plus one pair of regular glasses, roughly 1,233 receipts and various gift cards, a book and my Nintendo DS without having to say "Petunia Picklebottom" on it. How about Vitalio Vera instead?

Pretty, ruffled scarves that match anything and pretty up even my furry cargo parka. Plus, with a little v-neck sweater? Die of cuteness overload. (Lori's Shoes)


Uber prim-looking headbands work with messy second-day hair. So easy! (Tilly's)


Peacock anything. I have this exact necklace from Forever 21, and I love to wear it with a white tunic, skinny jeans and my Fryes. Accesories? DONE. K, now I actually want to wear it today.


PENCIL SKIRTS! I have been coveting this one from Arden B for a month now. I just sent it to my husband for my Christmas list. But in general, there is nothing I like more than a vintage, ladylike silhouette. Hips do not lie. At least that's what Shakira told me, and she's pretty dependable in general.


Trench coats match anything. It's a fact. And this one is only $23 from Tilly's and I love army green. I think it comes in black and cream too. Either way, it's the perfect topper for anything; dress, skirt, jeans, you name it. Look for one that grazes the hips.


Bows and pearls. I've purchased three sets of bow earrings and pearl earrings and I love how sophisticated they look, even when I'm just wearing them with a tank top and cardigan. Adorable! (Betsey Johnson, who I don't usually like... but I like these!)


Tights. I so very much love winter and how awesome tights are with winter. These ones with the bows? Squee! (ModCloth... I also featured them last week.)

Soft, slouchy boots and the banishment of heels until springtime. I love boots because they look dressy even when you're shlubbing it in jeans and a sweater. It's so easy to look put together with expensive-looking boots (BTW, these ones are under $50 from Wild Diva)

I am loving the transition to winter! I'll confess, I listened to Christmas music one evening while it was snowing, but I have since reined myself in. Now I plan to start Christmas prep on Saturday. Sorry, Thanksgiving, but you're too late in the year and I'm having pretend Christmas the first week of December.

Anybody else want to chime in on something you're thankful for?

A Lesson on Fit and Proportion

Every time I pick up any women's magazine (I currently receive Glamour, InStyle and for inexplicable reasons Women's Health omg I have a magazine addiction) there's undoubtedly an article about "The Best Jeans for Your Butt!" or "Swimsuits for Your Shape!". In the pages therein you'll find pictures of women dressed poorly before and looking fab after, with the help of better clothes and a virtual army of hair and makeup people.

Yet, every month, the same cover stories. Why? Because no one really *gets* it. Picking out an outfit and dressing yourself need not be a project for Cosmopolitan. Instead, it makes things easier when you realize that all of looking good in your clothes boils down to one thing: PROPORTION.

Now, first off, it should be said that an hourglass shape is the holy grail of body shapes. That's what you're going for. While other shapes are very lovely, an hourglass shape is the most proportionate. An hourglass shape occurs when you have a waist that is smaller than your chest and hips, which are proportionate to each other.

Bummer, right? We don't all have the vampy ladylike body of Marilyn Monroe. BUT!! We can totally fake it. Learn how to balance your proportions, and you'll be able to pick out an outfit and most importantly, work it. Suuuuper easy.

First you'll need to look in the mirror. Or measure yourself. Either way, you need to know your body shape. There's five basic shapes.

Hourglass: We covered this already. Were you even paying attention? If you've got an hourglass shape, you need to do everything in your power to show off that tiny waist. Belts are your best friends, as are wrap dresses and fitted shirts. DON'T put it all on display. You may have a lovely body, but pick one feature to show off. Boobs, legs, waist, whatever. You don't need too small, too tight, too revealing. It's gross.

Theme Rayon-Blend Slub-Jersey Wrap Dress, $62
Casual Trench, 20 GBP
Heels|Shoes:Stiletto Heel,Heel Pump,Women's High Heel Shoes,Spool..., $17
Lucky Brand 'Large' Printed Canvas Shopper, $39
Metal Flower Headband, 8 GBP

Pear: A pear shape has a smaller chest and waist with larger hips. I know, I feel for you. This means that to look better, you need to balance the largeness of your badonkadonk with your chest. The best way to do this? Layers! Oh how I love fall because it mans I can bring out delicious jackets and sweaters and blazers again. These will add bulk up top so your body looks balanced. You may want to avoid things that are heavily belted because it will show clear definition where your generous hips begin. Keep the focus up top. Stay away from skinny jeans. It's just not gonna happen. Bootcut for you, baby.

Pilot : Cap Sleeve Knitted Shrug, 10 GBP
Petite vertical denims Navy, 16 GBP
Pointed Studded Ballerina, 15 GBP
Studded Flower Hobo Handbag: Clothing, $47
Betsey Johnson - Betsey Paris Fluer de Lis Studs (Brass Ox) - Jewelry, $31
Striped cotton scarf, $45
Utility Belted Blazer - Best Sellers - tops & basics - Vanity, $30

Apple: If you've an apple, your hips and waist are similar in size, and your chest is smaller (darn small chests) Apples need to create a clear definition between what is waist and what is hip, so choose dresses with three distinct parts: bodice, waist, skirt. This will break up your body so it doesn't all come together in the middle. Tummy controlling jeans are your friends, as are empire waists. They'll make your waist look longer without calling attention to trouble areas.

Exclusive Red Big Sleeve Dress**, 45 GBP
Faux Suede Heel Boot - Teen Clothing by Wet Seal, $10
All Over Sequin Bow Metallics Clutch, 30 GBP
Carolee Double Drop Cognac Earrings - Max and Chloe, $38
Stone Stack Ring, $18

(PS, I could not love a human baby as much as I love this dress)

Inverted Triangle: Got a big rack and a tiny waist and no bum? You are an inverted triangle, my friend! That means you need to do what you can to balance out your top half with the bottom. You need to add volume around your hips with fuller skirts and embellishment. Shirts that end right at the hips can make them look more proportionate as well. Look for jeans with flap pockets to add a little bulk around the bum.

Roll Sleeve Burnout Top - Teen Clothing by Wet Seal, $17
A-line Woven Skirt, $20
Nicole Magical flower ballet flats in burnt orange, $73
Ted Baker 'Poppy Print' Hobo, $47
Kingdom Gold Holy Cross Key Necklace, $28
Gold Knotted Chain Belt, 20 GBP

Ruler: Oh, rulers. You are straight up and down with no curves at all. On the plus side? You look so good in skinny jeans. On the down side, you can look boyish if you're not careful. Belt things to create a waist, and look for tops with a clear emphasis or embellishment at the waist. Look for feminine detailing, like frills and sequins that girly up your boyish shape. Stay away from anything too column-like unless you're willing to belt as well. Breaking up your silhouette will fool the eye into thinking your have kickin' curves.

BKE Braided Cardigan Sweater, $48
FULL TILT Lace Rose Womens Tank, $15
AE Women's Skinny Jeans, $50
Black Faux Leather Pointed Toe Knee Hight Boot, $25
Woven Hobo Handbag: Clothing, $47
Peacock Feather Earrings, $13
Double wrap stud & punchout belt Black, 20 GBP


No matter what your shape, as long as you remember that you're always trying to achieve that hourglass shape, it can give you a little more direction in dressing and accessorizing. And it proves that even if you don't have model thin hips and porn star boobs, you can make it work (Is anyone else watching Project Runway? omg I love Tim Gunn.)

Size Doesn't Matter

.... but FIT does.

So the other day I was shopping because my favorite pair of bermuda shorts totally ripped and I was sad and depressed. I'd had them for like four years and was positive that I would never find a pair that I liked as much. Anyway, as I was looking through the racks of shorts, I came across a pair that I really liked. I looked at the tag (you guys are going to get more than you asked for in this post because I'm totally going to be revealing my sizing information) and the size six, which I usually am, looked impossibly small. I grabbed bot the six and the eight. I continued shopping, because I like to go to the fitting room with a solid armload of clothes. I've always wanted a pair of really lightweight pants and I found a pair in camo that I loved. But this time, it was a different brand and the six looked WAY too big. So I grabbed the six and the four and went off to try them on.

Well, what do you know? I ended up going home with a size eight pair of shorts and a size four pair of pants.

THIS IS WHY YOU MUST TRY THINGS ON.

I cannot stress how important trying on clothes is. Every. Single. Brand. Is. Different. You can't rely on your "regular" size to guide you because the fit and style will also have a bearing on how things look on your frame. So put on your big girl pants and go to the fitting room. Please.

Let's make fitting rooms less scary, shall we?

1) Acknowledge the fact that dressing rooms have the worst light ever, unless you're in a lingerie store. Take a look at yourself wearing your normal clothes before you start trying on to give yourself a baseline. That way, when you put on something and don't love the way it looks you can decide if its a bad fit or the fitting room is bringing you down.

2) When you're looking for a specific item, like a cocktail dress or swimsuit, DON'T BRING CHILDREN. I can handle my kids in a fitting room if its totally casual and I don't care whether or not I buy something. But when I'm on a feverish hunt for a dress, my kids totally drive me up the wall and I get flustered. I throw clothes on and don't give them a proper look before I decide, and it has rendered me plenty of clothes that I don't really like.

3) Make the fitting room attendant useful. When she says "Let me know if you need anything," let her know if you need anything. Don't abandon your efforts because something doesn't fit and you don't want to wander into the store in your underwear looking for a different size. Poke you head out and get her over there. She'll actually love that she's doing something other than unlocking doors and looking bored.

4) Keep record of what size you are in certain labels. For instance, if you shop at Old Navy a lot, have your sizing info on hand so that if they have a killer online deal, you can order knowing that things will fit. I just keep a little file on my computer, and when I get a piece of clothing from a brand I like, I'll punch in what size it was so I have it for future reference. Heaven forbid I ever miss out on a sale ever.

5) Get over the number. So what if you have to go a size up? It's better than looking like this:


Getting a larger size to fit the widest part of your body will make you slimmer in comparison. If you're like me and ridiculously misproportioned, get a tailor. The waist of my pants never fit me until I have them taken in. If you don't like the number on the pants, clip it out so you don't have to look at it. Do what you have to do to get over your size, because guess what? It's just a number. It does not determine how attractive you are. Stop concerning yourself about your size, and worry more about fit.

So the next time you're shopping and hopelessly squeezing yourself into something that absolutely will not work, decide how you want to be seen? Weirdly, misshapen sausage? Or lovely svelte lady? I think the choice basically makes itself.

Skills: The Smoky Eye

I have seen smoky done right, and smoky eye done oh so very, very wrong. The trick is to learn WHEN to use the smoky eye. Going to your child's graduation? Probably not smoky eye material. Date night with your husband? Yes please.

First off, the COLOR that you use to make your smoky eye will have a big effect on the final outcome. While black and gray are traditional, they are pretty serious and can look a *leetle* on the slutty side if done with a heavy hand. If you're new to the powers of the smoky eye, start with a different color. Brown and taupe are nice, and my personal fave is easily plum and purple.

Heeeeere's the steps! With pics from moi. From my husband's blackberry; my camera didn't like the swim in Dr. Pepper that it took. Boo0urns.

1) Apply a little primer to your eyelid. I have suuuuper crease-y eyes and if I don't give the makeup something to stick to, I get crease lines and they are not cool. If you don't use a primer, dab a little liquid foundation over the eyelid and call it good.

2) Use a lighter shade of your smoky eyeshadow and sweep it over the entire eyelid, to the crease line. This will give your smoky eye a little more depth so it doesn't look so severe. You want soft smoky eyes, not porno smoke eyes, got it? I did a light purple, which you can see below.


(This is how I mix my eyeshadow... I get the brush wet and and load it up in the eyeshadow cap. When wetting eyeshadow, create a paste-like texture and it'll stay on forever.

3) Now, here's a personal preference thing. I love me some liquid eyeliner and will occasionally use it for a smoky eye, but an eyeliner brush dipped in eyeshadow will make for a smudgier look. Either one works. To use eyeshadow, pick the darker shade of eyeshadow and WET your eyeliner brush (it's the one with a small, angled end.) Dab the brush into the eyeshadow, pressing down on either side of the brush to get a finer tip.

(See that thin line of darker color right above the lash line? That's it! If you decide to use a liquid liner, use a wet brush to smudge up the line so it isn't so precise. )

4) Begin from the inner eyelid and sweep the brush out to the outer corner of your eyes. I like a little cattiness in my smoky eye, so I give it the TINIEST flick of my wrist at the end. If you mess up, don't freak out. Just wet a q-tip and run it along the top of the eyeshadow for a cleaner line.

5) Dip the brush again into the dark shadow without wetting it first. This will give you a super smudgey look on the bottom. I brush (WITH A VERY LIGHT HAND) a little of the eyeshadow underneath my bottom lashes on the outside corner only. Any more and you'll get too Night of the Living Dead.

6) Take a regular soft kohl pencil in a close-ish color and line your water line. That's the inner rim oof the bottom of your eye. If this makes you squeamish, skip it, but it'll give some incredible definition without giving crazy eyes.

7) Use a regular eyeshadow brush (the puffy one) to sweep a little of the darker shade of eyeshadow into the crease of your eye, keeping it lighter the closer you get to the inner corner of your eyelids, so the outer eyelid is darker and more dramatic.

(K, so you're looking for a graduation of color. The inside of the eyelid is lighter and it gets darker as it moves out for the smoky effect without being too severe. )

8) Finally, curl your eyelashes with my patented method (Three times: Once at the base, then in the middle, then at the tips) and apply two coats of brown or black mascara. You've got it, foxy lady!

(for daytime, go with brown mascara. For night time, a couple of coats of black will make your eyelashes look crazy long. I'm not even wearing falsies here!)

SO there she is... check out that smokiness without sluttiness! It's an art form, really.

Here's the finished product. Pssst little hint here; when doing a dramatic eye it helps to keep everything else neutral, and wearing your hair up brings attention to your awesome eyes.

Be kind, I totally did this at ten at night in my bathroom because I thought having a few photo examples would help you conquer it. My husband was yelling at me to go to bed. Yeah, you're welcome for that. PS you can totes see my bra. IT WAS LATE.

I know it seems like a lot of steps, but once you've nailed it you'll feel more comfortable with the process and create a pretty much ideal smoky eye to make the other moms jealous.

Play with color combos to get different looks. Gold and taupe is super hot, especially for blue eyes, and a navy/ turquoise combo is crazy awesome for brown eyes. You can do it! I have faith in you!

How To: Curl Your Hair FAST

So we're all in agreement that it's annoying when someone thinks that because you look put together, you're neglecting your kids, right? Especially when there are so many shortcuts to getting ready that there's no excuse for looking like you walked out of a bad mom commercial.

I was just thinking about how me and my two best friends as a teenager, Vanessa and Erin, would get together for the sole purpose of "getting ready". We would drag all of our hair and makeup stuff to Vanessa's house, because she had the biggest mirror, and take HOURS to get ready for a Friday night. One day, while getting ready, Vanessa discovered :ironing" her hair. Like, actually ironing it. With a clothes iron. Thus commenced a year of ironed hair for all of us.

It really did make it straight!

But ironing your hair is very, very bad for it. Can we say damage? Just think of all the crap you subjected your hair to as a teenager in the name of beauty. Then you have a couple of kids and up into the ponytail it goes! It gets to the point that if you DO style your hair, your husband is all "Hey, did you lose weight? Let's head upstairs!"

My hair is a frustrating cross between wavy and straight, so for me to tame it into submission, it must be styled. And ever since I found this neato little trick, it takes me two seconds to look put together and polished. And now I will dispense this wisdom for you.

CURL WITH A FLAT IRON!

I know that this doesn't make sense. I've been doing it for like, six months and I still don't know really how it works, it just does. And it's so easy and fast.

So you have a flat iron right? A skinny, inch-wide one is best. I usually do this when I've gotten out of the shower and didn't take the time to blow dry my hair, so it's all wild and wavy in weird places. Here's the steps that I take.

1) Brush a mousse or hairspray through your hair to give it a little staying power.

2) Take a small section of one to two inches, and clamp the flat iron in, as per usual, like you're going to straighten it.

3) Then, twist the flat iron upward, so that the top of the flat iron is flat against your head.

4) Slowly drag the flat iron downward, holding the twisted position all the way down.

5) Voila! You should get a) a perfect curl and b) a tangled cord. But we don't care about the tangled cord so much when pretty curls are to be had!

6) Repeat all over your head.

The benefit is that it takes no longer to curl your hair than it takes to straighten it. AND! The curls are loose and natural, not Shirley Temple and girly. Here's a pic of me with flat iron curls (they are also pinned back.) Also, my daughter has them too. VERSATILE!



So honestly, if you have five minutes to spare today, try the flat iron curl and see that it takes two seconds to look out of the ordinary. Then give your flat iron a little kiss NOT WHILE IT'S HOT and thank it for saving you from a lifetime of curling irons. Seriously. I haven't touched mine for like, a year.


ETA: I found a really good tutorial online for those who want to see how it's done. This girl curls in the opposite way than I do, but I think going both ways, turning some out AND turning some in, give a more natural curl over all.

Big Girl Color Combos

I think that after a long winter, everyone just starts hitting autopilot when it comes to getting dressed in the morning. Even previously super cute clothes become drab daily wear when you never change it up. And I know it gets totally hard to be inspired to look good everyday when all you have is play-doh rolling on the docket.

That's why I find just switching up my color combos to something newer and fresher can take a drab outfit and breathe new life into it. I think so often we get stuck in the "red and black" rut that we can't see past the usual color combos. But switching things up and trying something new totally makes you look like you went shopping, when all you did was rifle through your closet for a while.

Big girl color combos are those that you may not immediately pair together, but they are much more sophisticated. I like to use black as an accent color more than basing my entire outfit from it, so I can claw my way out of the black box we all put ourselves in.

Combo #1: Red and Navy

I love love love red and navy together. It's crisp and clean, and has an awesome nautical vibe to it. Be careful when pairing with white, you may come across as looking very patriotic. Unless of course, that was your point, like me and my daughter were doing here:

It was the Fourth of July, okay? Don't judge me. Plus, I never ever get a chance to wear my white cargo pants.

So anyway, I feel like black is a much more sophisticated way to accent a navy and red outfit:

Items in this set:
Flutter Rosette Top, $16
Old Navy Womens The Flirt Wide-Leg Trouser Jeans, $19
Rocket Dog Capucinedb, $36
Furla 'Elizabeth' Medium Leather Handbag
Pretty In Pearls Metallic Blue Drop Earrings, $18

So pretty and clean!!

Combo #2: Gray and Orange

Did I ever tell you that I ALWAYS spell "gray" wrong? I went to Grade One with a kid named Stephen Grey, and to this day can't remember which is the right way to spell the color.

I love orange as an accent color to gray because I feel like orange gets paired with brown to often, and it always looks autumn-y. Which is fine for say, autumn, but not so good the rest of the year. It's unexpected and polished, without being too fuddy duddy.

Items in this set:
Black/white ruched bust shirt, 20 GBP
Orange V Neck Cardigan, 10 GBP
High-waist pencil skirt, $435
Women's shoes/bags: AK Anne Klein Sweet Pea - Black, $50
Merona® Satchel - Black : Target bag purse, $20

Okay, so while this outfit looks conservative, a cool pair of patterned tights makes it current without looking prostitute-secretary. Also, I love that with gray/grey you can play with texture. Tweed shoes? Yes, please!

Combo #3 - Brown and Purple

But Jae, you say, what do I do with all of my brown clothes if I can't wear them with orange? The answer? Purple! Yay! I love purple/violet/plum clothes. They look rich while still being low maintenance, and I have yet to see a person that purple looks bad on. Purple looks fine with gray or black, but parining it with brown brings out the richer tones.

Items in this set:
Asymmetrical Triangle Ruffle Tank, $16
Grey Heart Pocket Blazer, 30 GBP
John Lewis Women Brushed Sateen Trouser, Chocolate,, 27 GBP
Women's shoes/bags: Restricted Ashlee - Cream, $50
Monsoon Accessorize - 3 x Mixed Heart & Flower Brooch Set, 10 GBP

I love the idea of this for a nice date night. And I love pairing it with a clutch that has different variations of the same color in it. Le sigh, I want it.

Combo #4 - Yellow, black and white...with a little red thrown in for good measure.

Black and white never, never, never goes out of style. It ALWAYS looks put together and pretty, and it's obviously easy to put together. Throwing on a few colored accessories when you're wearing black and white makes it look pretty and springy without looking crazy.

Items in this set:
White cuff sleeve v-neck top, 7 GBP
A-line Flower Skirt, $23
Michael Antonio Kerrel Open Toe Pump - Free Overnight Shipping &..., $40
Coquette: 22 posts from May 2008 Lemondrops necklace
Mossimo® Black: Four Poster Tote - Red : Target, $25

I so, so love this skirt. It's floral while still being current. The yellow shoes? I die. This would be so cute going to church, or even doing family pictures in (another topic I plan to tackle next week). It makes the black and white less ordinary.

So, look in your closet and see what colors you can pair together that you hadn't previously thought of. Your wardrobe doesn't have to stop at black, white and red.

Hey!! What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburned pilgrim! AHAHAHAHA.