Freaky Friday

 Everyone excited for the loooong weekend? My husband's birthday is always over Labor Day so I feel mucho pressure to make it awesome. We're headed for some boating, which means my husband will fish patiently while I nap and read books and eat Pringles, which for some reason taste like, 100 times better on the water. So let's get this done so I can go buy those delicious canned chips.

 I saw these posted on a tumblr with outfit ideas for them, which included wearing cutoffs and a tank. First, thanks for that inventive pairing. Second, yes, let's pair your heinous denim sandal sneakers with MORE DENIM. 

PS They look like flappy old-timey cartoon hobo shoes and that's all I will say about the matter. 

 Robin told me to search for "upcycle" on Pinterest and turned up this beauty of a failed home craft project. Like, I can't sew, but I KNOW I can't sew, you know? I feel like more people should be able to admit this.

 I'm officially becoming jaded, because when I saw this all I could think about is how the giant prongs look uneven.

 Fashion tip: If I can see a butt crease, you are no longer wearing shorts, you are wearing underwear. 

Bonus tip: Literally no one wants to see your butt crease. 

 Bonnie sent these over and I knew they were going to be bad because the title was "Mixed Metal Leggings." Leggings should never have mixed anything, much less patchy leather that makes legs look stumpy. 

 Does someone wanna teach this girl how to subtle?

 Rachelle sent over these shoes that give me visions of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which is one of the only horror movies that made my CRY in fear. 

...so if anyone needs me I'll be in fetal position with the doors locked

 Lindsay sent this prime example of how to look like a complete idiot at your next pep rally. Expect Miley Cyrus to wear it at her next red carpet appearance.

This dress reminds me of a handy tip a reader from my hometown sent. 

Oh, Tim Gunn. You get me. 

Alright, I'm checking out for the weekend and I may or may not be around on Monday. I'm leaning toward may not, so don't judge me.

Fiiiine judge me.