Freaky Friday

 I just remembered why the month of May is the woooorst. Is it me or is there a crazy influx of everything? My 5-year-old's preschool graduation was yesterday and then next week is completely booked up.

Can I just say my that the worst people in the world are officially parents who film entire school programs on their iPads with the cover open? No, you go ahead and take up literally three feet of wingspan in front of my face. I came to watch the entire thing on your screen anyway. Reality check: Preschool graduations aren't that great and your kid isn't that interested and you'll actually never watch a grainy, shaky video of your child singing "Kookaburra" from the back row again. Film one song and cool it.

Clearly I had some feelings after yesterday's activities. So glad that's over. The only part I filmed was when my kid stood up and said "Hi, my name's Andrew and when I grow up, I want to be a cowboy."

Perf.

Hey, this swimsuit is awesome because it makes you look like the quarterback -- complete with jock strap.

 Sometimes, I don't have funny quips for clothes. I honestly just look at them and am like "Ugh, what the heck is this slop?" 

This is one of those times. 

Lipboob. So hot right now. 

 Enjoy the pentagram this swimsuit burns into your chest, witch. 

 The description for this romper says that it'll keep you "cool and dry." 

I'm not going to get into specifics, but I would argue that there's parts of this outfit that look neither 

cool nor dry. 

Ahem.

 You know I love me a wedge/high top/sandal/Vibram hybrid. 

 From the "Saved by the Bell Goes to Hawaii" collection. 

Other times this would be appropriate for a grown woman:

-You're a Fly Girl.

-You're part of the title sequence for "Blossom." 

That's pretty much it. 

 You're cool, but are you see-though flap on your pants for iPhone usage cool?

Hey, the Green Lantern needs to kick back on the boardwalk too (nerd humor). 

Yeah, so sorry if posting gets a little sporadic around here while I schlep kids to various activities and unnecessary school functions for the next two weeks. Seriously, I'm dying for June, after which I'll start complaining that my kids are bored and driving me crazy. 

I can't wait either.