Freaky Friday: Fun with Keywords

For those of you new to the bah-log, Fun with Keywords is when I comb through my site analytics to find the search queries people use to get to my website. And, because I'm a nice person, I try to fulfill as many of these requests as possible. 

Here's some of the latest and greatest from my StatCounter.

"velvet bodysuit"

Oh, hey Donna Martin, glad to see you finally go Internet service in the 90210. I can only assume that Donna Martin is the only one searching this, because she's proooobably the last person past 1991 who actually wanted  a velvet bodysuit.

Don't look so smug.

"Sexy unicorn guy"

Once, my brother thought it would be reaaaaaally funny to post this picture as my Facebook profile picture:



It was. It was funny. But ever since then, sexual deviants have been searching for the same picture on my blog. THERE ARE YOU HAPPY?

"redneck driving gloves"

This is kind of out of my demographic, so here's the best I have.

They're waterproof!!


"cheeseburger crotch"

Seriously guys?







I hate my life.


"Canadian flag lingerie"

Oh, didn't you know? Canadians don't wear lingerie. We sleep in parkas in our igloos with pet mooses. Meese. Whatever.

...or this.



Also, I'm headed to Canada in two weeks and I am suuuuuper excited to get all the food in my belly. PIE EATING CONTEST!

"reasons to wear a dress"

OK, here goes:
1. They're pretty.
2. They make you feel girly.
3. You can wear them every day.
4. When you overeat pie in Canada, they hide the results.
 

"dressing like a raccoon" 



 
 ... end scene.

Happy Friday friends!