Freaky Friday: Stuff I Don't Get

Ugh, I'm so mad because as I was getting dressed this morning I found a hole in my sweater. Am I still wearing it? Yes. But it's the principle of the thing! Luckily I have zero plans so the only people who will see my holey sweater are the moms in the pickup line and my husband, after I badger him to take me to lunch.

Meanwhile, let's visit some stuff I currently don't get.

Celebrities who whine that no one leaves them alone and then post swimsuit selfies to Instagram.  #geeiwonderwhy

 Animal sweaters. I know like, everyone is obsessed with foxes and whatnot, but there is literally NO way to wear an animal sweater and not look like a twee 12-year-old.

Plus they ALL remind me of this: 

A clothing company in Canada called Northern Getaway that only specialized in sweatshirts with animals on them in the 90s. If you wore Northern Getaway, you were probably that weird girl in my 5th grade class who licked tin foil and then stuck it to the side of her desk. And then later, peeled it off and continued to lick it.

So yeah... I won't be wearing an animal sweater anytime soon.

 Sweater leggings. Are they sweaters? Are they leggings? One thing is for sure: They're STILL not a substitute for pants.

People who are obsessed with J. Crew. It's a nice store and all, but I don't get the whole "Let's buy everything and copy the entire catalog" mentality. I also enjoy this article. My favorites are "Guys with Beards" and "First Ladies." 

Get out there, preppies. There's a whole world of fashion to explore! And no, simply transitioning to Anthropologie doesn't count.

 People who wear toques/beanies in this manner. Like, it's not even covering your ears. Also, if it's cold enough to wear a knitted hat, it's probably cold enough to wear a jacket. And not shorts. Aaaaand I officially sound old.

Open toe booties. I never ever want to see toes sticking out of boots. They look like an old timey cartoon hobo's shoes.

 This.


OK, it's your turn. What are you not getting lately? Also, feel free to email me angrily if you have recently turned your iPhone charger into a hair accessory and think I'm a jerk.