Freaky Friday

I am having one of those super low motivation days. Like, I got up, got some work done, hit my workout and now... nothing. Instead, I have a major case of the shopping trunkies. Since my husband has been on the mend since Monday, I haven't left the house for anything but prescription medication in five days. To be honest, I think I might ditch everything and go poke around the mall for a bit.

But I am productive enough for Freaky Friday! Also, the big news of the week is my getting Instagram. We can be friends if you want: nomoremomjeans. I'm still getting the hang of it. My little brother keeps texting me helpful tips on what is and isn't OK. Sibling tech love!

But before I ditch my life and do something unproductive, here's some freakiness.

 Do designers sometimes just look at the front of a garment? Because no on in his right mind would see the rear view and be like "Yes, that's exactly the pancake longbutt we're going for. Order 10,000."

 Speaking of rear view, check out these babies. Those are brake lights. On the bum. 

It reminds me of that episode of "My Strange Addiction" where the guy thought he was in a relationship with his male car even though he wasn't gay. I feel like if he did have a human relationship, these pants would be involved. 

Also, I've thought up six pickup lines involving these pants, none of which are appropriate for a blog that my mom reads. You can put some in the comments section though!

 My new most hated pair of leggings. Which is impressive because I hate pretty much every pair of leggings.

 Armadillo purse. How creepy would this be under like, a restaurant table. On second thought, this isn't freaky. It's awesome. I want it so I can scare waiters.

 Methinks a court somewhere has lost its fool, dost thou agree?

Translation: This is stupid, amiright?

 Dawn sent these with the message that they looked super practical for running errands. I thought I'd add to the list of where these pants would be practical.
-While wearing stilts

- A high fashion prison party.
-Housing a flea circus ewwww

-Taking yourself waaaaaaaaaay too seriously. 

 People be like "YOLO" and I'm like "Eat broccoli, watch Wheel of Fortune and go to bed at a decent time." EBWWOFFAGTBAADT, yo! 

  I like my outfits to say "I'm not a woman, I'm a shapeless blob who doesn't want you to look at me."

Do I need to remind you that Valentine's Day is coming up? Why not rev his engine by dressing like the fatty pig meat that he loves!? Meow. 

OK, seriously, I feel like that took up the one last ounce of productivity I had saved up. Time to shirk my responsibilities for the rest of the day woo!