Freaky Friday

Is it me or have we not done a Freaky Friday lately? All of that Halloween and vacation stuff threw me off. And I had a folder full of good material just begging to be made fun of. I shall not let it down.

 

Like this body suit... that wishes it was a bikini. Doesn't it look like one of those swimsuit coverups that old ladies wear that have a hot body painted on them? I can't think of a time where I was like "Gee, I wish I could wear a swimsuit but also a sweater."

 What is with these bodysuits? This one looks like her top half is in jail. Free the boobs!

 I've seen many an ugly boot in my day, but this is among the top winners. Garbage bag material? Check. Clod-hopper bottoms? Check check. Least flattering cut that makes your feet look like hooves? YAY!

 I had a ton of readers send me a whole slew of super scary shoes with gun heels. GUN HEELS. These ones also have snake heads on them to say "Not only am I terrifying human being, but I will literally eat your head if you look at me the wrong way."

 The cow hoof ones are a little gentler. I think they say, "You can take the girl out of the country, but then she'll obnoxiously sing along with every Shania Twain song and tell everyone how country she is and you'll never hear the end of it." At least I think that's how the saying goes. 

 Oh good! Sad adult baby diapers with stangely-placed bum flaps. PERFECT.

 I believe seven different readers recognized these monstrosities and sent them my way. It's like someone trying to out-gangster another person. You think you wear your pants low? MINE ARE AT MY ANKLES. Word.

 Of course, this would be on the other side of things. I'm sorry, but at this point, wouldn't you just wear actual jeans? 

 

I got these from Aly. These look like a faceplant waiting to happen. Why do designers consistently want women to fall down and have embarrassing moments in bright, look-at-me shoes? 

Oh, I'm sure Elle Fanning is a darling girl,but this outfit gets worse as you scroll down. It's like 

Shoulders: OK, I like the color, pretty fabric. 

Middle: Umm alright I can get on board with those please I guess. 

Skirt: OK you're losing me here, Elle. 

Shoes: What in the blue blazes are you doing with rockets strapped to your feet? 

(Thanks Lindsey. See? It was Lindsey who made me do it! Blame her!) 

Now I'm off to be struck by lightening for criticizing a teenager. I'm a monster. It was nice knowing you.