Freaky Friday: I Heart My Readers

Friday, October 21, 2011

I've been getting everyone's Halloween costume submissions and I AM LOVING THEM. Some have actually left me speechless. I'm going to do the Freaky Friday Halloween Sexy Costume extravaganza next Friday and I'll also reveal my own Halloween costume. I bet you can't guess what it issss!

But besides vulgar Halloween costumes, my readres are also always sending me the best Freaky Friday submissions. I love you guys. It makes my job easier and makes me think that someone is actually reading this drivel. That makes me feel warm inside and it's not just because I have heartburn from eating PopTarts for breakfast.

Let's do it!

Meleah alerted me that they just released the preview of the Versace for H&M collection. Don't get me wrong, there's a lot of really cool places. The stud dress is ah-mazing. But some of them are so Mya Rudaolph-playing-Donaltella-Versace-on-SNL-ish I can't even stand it.

I feel like I shouldn't have to say this, but let's just make a general rule against pink uterus shapes on your abdomen? OK. Because up close this is a pretty albeit super weird beach scene, but far away it's a treasure map.


This dress makes me feel festive in a cat-getting-into-the-tinsel way.

My younger brother also just informed me that one of my parent's cats has a digestive problem and has been barfing everywhere. I was never so glad to live 3,000 miles away.

I have no idea why I just told you that.


YAY! For when you can't decide how you want to look: awkward and crazy... or awkward and crazy!

I went through a brief fixation with fur vests last year. Thank heavens I didn't give in. This looks like a gorilla, Donatella.


Rebecca sent me what might be the world's most inappropriate boots. Inappropriate for what? Life and mankind. And straight people.


She also sent me this PURE awesome. Anyone else have the urge to reach out and pinch this bum?
Yeah, me neither.
Also, I am always lamenting about how the ugliest part on the male body is the upper thigh. I will add that both front and back of the thigh are equally offensive. Especially on this guy.



Lindsay sent me these boots that she noted would be perfect for self defense. Although, if you're wearing these, you probably deserve to be mugged. Also, I'd love to see you try and run.


I got the best email from Jo who is from my hometown far, far away and reads my blog because her daughter used to work with my brother. How awesome is that? It's from Joe Fresh, which I actually like. Unfortunately, this dress looks like that paper that came in rolls in the 90s and to use it you would have to unroll it and flatten it out. What was that stuff even called? My mom used to make bows out of and stick it on wreaths in our house.

Also, is it me or does it look like that dress would make a weird sound when you walked in it?

It was posted on the Toronto Star website with an option to vote for love it loathe it... but I didn't see one for "kill it with fire?"


My Aussie friend Mina sent me these socks. I wondered if you could just wear them with a bra and call it a Halloween costume, but she said she'd rather wear them to the grocery store to see what people did. I think it's problematic that the capes are only on the socks... does that mean only the calves can fly? Awkward.

As always, thanks to my loverly readers who keep me supplied with the web's ugliest clothes. It makes me oh so happy.

So if you were following along on the Facebook page, you'd know that I was considering the purchase of a pair of red skinny jeans and needed the opinions of my trusted fans before I moved forward. I'm happy to say that you approved and I'm needy, so I went and got my pair at Contagious (local girls, seriously, check it out... they have awesome clothes. Where else can I find a pair of red jeans on Main Street, for goodness sakes.) I'm so excited to wear them today. I have a hot date with Footloose and I intend to pay homage to the red cowboy boots with my red jeans.

See? I really couldn't do it without you guys. Mwa! (That was a kiss or the beginning of an evil laugh.... I'll never tell!)

Also, 10 points to whoever can guess what I'm dressing up as for Halloween. If you're one of the three people I've told YOU CAN'T GUESS and I'll cut you off as a friend. Want a hint? It doesn't involve lingerie OR a tail.

12 comments:

IandS said...

You just know that somebody, somewhere is wearing that fur vest with nothing underneath...I'm pointing my finger at all the Gaga fans...

Victoria said...

Your costume doesn't involve a tail or lingerie? Tsk, tsk. I guess you're just not SASSY enough to pull it off.
Because looking like a prostitute is nothing if not sassy!

Jae said...

IandS... you know it's happening.
Victoria, I am sorry to disappoint. I shall be shunned among all of the skeezy teenagers at the mall!

April Yost said...

I just "pinned" the crochet shorts. Bwahahah!

Jenna said...

Ok. Two words for that blue dress:

Mammogram time.

Unknown said...

The first skirt looks to me like it's saying "Paradise: This way!" I would never want that on my crotch,thankyouverymuch.

Unknown said...

Ooh!! Ooh! Here's my guess and suggestion for a halloween costume for you, Jae.

http://desmond.yfrog.com/Himg640/scaled.php?tn=0&server=640&filename=zpkgp.jpg&xsize=640&ysize=640

Anonymous said...

Jae people are pinning this Versace crap! EEK!! The skirt and some equally terrible leggings.

I have no idea what you are going to be for Halloween...

Lela

Jae said...

Marci... I have no words. NO WORDS. Except for the words "no words," obviously.

Lela... I KNOW. I am sad for people who are like "It's Versace... so it's good, right?"

Jae said...

PS Jenna: Ahahahahaha. YES.

Misty said...

I've never in my life had the urge to learn how to crochet... until now.

Unknown said...

okaysoooo I do not care how long ago this freaky friday was posted I am reminiscing.... tis fun... but the whole thing about the upper thigh being unattractive on a man is like UNBEARABLY true. Jussayin :)

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