Freaky Friday

YOU GUYS. I just had to take my 5-year-old for his kindergarten shots. Fun thing about preemies is that their shot schedules are all over the place and he still needed four. Ugh. Like, I'm not *that* snuggly lovey parent, but when my kids have to have shots I will literally give them anything they ask for. Ever. He was so adorable going to the doctor's office and telling everyone how brave he was and then BAM needles in the legs.

Now I just want to stress eat everything in my house and cry. Instead, I'll do a Freaky Friday. Same same?

 Alyssa sent me these UGGs, which are being marketed as bridal wear. 

BRIDAL. WEAR. Guaranteed the girl who wears these under her wedding dress also has her chihuahua as a ring-bearer and doesn't realize her hot pink thong is visible under her dress. Seriously, I would bet my house on this.  

 Well you're standing pretty smug for someone wearing see-through pants and mom shorts. 

 Hey guys, have I told you how much I hate palazzo pants lately? Because I really freakin' hate them. Especially in colors that I would have used when painstakingly choosing crayons for my Barbie coloring book circa 1991. 

 And these were sold out. 

I can only assume that there's an epidemic of Amazon women who wish their legs looked wider and stumpier because otherwise I can't really understand why these would sell out. 

 Enjoy your patchouli burger, weird hippie neighbor everyone seems to have. 

 It's like Maid Marian went through a punk phase.

OMG I just remembered I have "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" saved on my DVR and I'm going to watch it like my JOB tonight. 

 And where does one wear glittery oxfords? A disco spelling bee? 

 My friend Brooke feels my pain, especially when these horrendous leg drapes are $450. 

 Kite boobs.

It's called fashion. Look it up. 

Alright, I'm off to drive my daughter to a birthday party and then to give my son anything to make me stop feeling so guilty.

Happy weekend, guys!

So You Got a Bad Haircut...

I remember being like, maaaaaybe 15 and deciding that I wanted to cut all of my hair off. It was a big deal: I had just bought my first shirt that wasn't from Nike and what I thought were the coolest pair of sunglasses ever. They had blue lenses, so I guess you could say I was pretty dope. 

In my bid to become hipper (seriously guys, I think I have a journal entry that details exactly how I planned on changing my image and it's embarrassing) I decided that my blunt, shoulder-length cut that I had literally rocked since second grade would have to go. I planned on a trendy, short pixie-type cut, which I tried to explain to my then-hairdresser. With copious pictures of Rachel Leigh Cook that I'd cut out of my YM magazine, natch.

I still vividly remember the sinking feeling that I had when she started hacking at my hair. I was in full-blown panic mode as she also added blunt bangs I NEVER asked for. When it was completely styled, there was no doubt about it.

I had a mushroom cut. 

And I lived with that mushroom cut for a year before it grew out. A year at 15, might I add, which feels a lot like a decade. Particularly when your two best friends are a) a talented dancer b) a gorgeous ingenue-type and you're forever labeled c) the funny one.  

It is with this in mind that we should talk haircuts. Believe it or not, the mushroom cut of '99 wasn't enough to sour me on taking hair risks forever. While I kept my hair in a layered short cut for the rest of high school, I've grown and chopped repeatedly since then. And for every nine great haircuts I get, there's one that makes me feel like this when the hairdresser starts cutting: 

 

 And because I'm terrified of confrontation, I usually just clam up and tip as usual because I'm awkward like that.

But I have learned how to deal with a bad haircut since then. Only once in my adult life have I hated a style so bad that I went back to the same hairdresser to have it fixed and it took every ounce of courage I've ever had to do that. If you're like me, try these steps first. 

1. Rewash and Style Again

I've definitely learned that sometimes, I feel like I hate a haircut, but it's really the way the hairdresser styled it that I hate. I'm not a huge fan of blowdrying with a round brush because I like a lot of texture over smoothness. And what's the first thing most stylists reach for during a blowout? A round brush. 

So when I've had that awful sinking feeling in my stomach and have thoughts like "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?" I will head home, wash my hair, and style it like I would normally. And more often than not, I like it 100 times better when it's more "me." 

2. Add Texture

Since I chopped my hair this last time, I've found that it's a lot harder to keep it straight. Without the weight of long hair, I get springy waves. And guess what? I love them. I wish that the stylist had thought to add texture when she styled it because it's way easier for maintenance and it really shows off the texture of the cut. 

If you totally hate the way your hair looks, grab a curling iron and some product (I curl with a flat iron). Seeing how your hair looks with some waves or curl can help you make peace with the style. 

3. Play with It 

OK, I'm going to be 100 percent honest here -- I haven't loved my bangs this time around. I always think I want them, but then I remember that they're kind of high maintenance and make me look younger than I am (with two kids in tow, I would very much like to look my age). 

But even though I yearn for my longer face-framing layers, I do love the versatility side swept bangs offer, something I never would have realized had I not taken the time to play around with them a little. Add bobby pins, try a chignon, play with layers, whatever. It'll be fun, I promise. 

4. Tell Your Hairdresser

I have talked to a TON of hairdressers and they've all said the same thing: They'd much rather have you come back and get your hair fixed than you just living with it. After all, it's basically a walking commercial for their services and if it looks like crap, it hurts them as much as it does you. And chances are that it was a communication error -- you said to give it a trim and she thought that meant to chop four inches. 

When I had to scrape up all of my courage and go back to my hairdresser she first, told me she knew I didn't like it when I left a few days earlier and second, thanked me for coming back. She added a few layers to what was kind of a blunt cut and I went merrily on my way. 

5. See Another Hairdresser

If you really feel uncomfortable going back to the hairdresser who first cut your hair, it's OK to go see someone else (another thing my hairstylist friends tell me repeatedly is that they're not offended when you go to someone else). Let your new hairdresser understand the issue (without bashing the other one) and give CLEAR critique, like "I asked for layers and it's too blunt," or "It's a lot shorter than I wanted." Then, you can think up a solutions: Adding highlights to create more movement, using extensions, cutting in bangs to add texture, etc. 

The bottom line? It can most likely be fixed or at least changed to a point where you can live with it.

Some stuff you shouldn't do:

• Cry and do nothing about it.
• Try to fix it yourself.
• Try and get your husband to fix it. 
• Avoid your hairdresser until the end of time.
• Swear off cutting your hair forever. 

The thing is that when you take risks with your look, it can go either way. I love getting my hair cut because it always makes me feel a little "new" but with that can come some seriously unfortunate outcomes. But guess what else is worse? Being so terrified to change that you end up look like a caricature of yourself in the 90s. I'll take a risk over that any day. 

Now please tell me you have some awesome "bad haircut" stories to share. 

What I Wore: Majority Rules

Ew, daylight savings time, am I right? I'm a habitual early riser (I try to get up around 6 every morning to get some work done before the morning school rush) and I hate waking up in the dark. Even my kids were like "WTH MOM" when I got them up this morning.

I spent Friday night at the annual benefit for the NICU at which I volunteer. It's always super fun and a little emotional and very posh and there is amazing food and entertainment and CUPCAKES. Axara Paris had sent me this dress a few months back and I knew it was the perfect benefit dress (it's cocktail attire). I popped it into my closet and only thought to try it on the day before.

Uh, I'm basically sewn into this dress. I forgot that European sizes run smaller than North American. I had my two kids standing on the bed, begging them to zip it up. And it fit! Until I gorged myself on mango salsa and sweet potato cakes and like, four cupcakes.

It was totally worth it. Also, majority ruled and I wore the shoes you guys picked out on Instagram. In full disclosure, however, I should point out that I only made it about two hours standing in these before I changed into flats for another couple of hours.

Dress: c/o Axara Paris (similar) (shorter) (adorable) (blue just because)

Shoes: Charlotte Russe (similar) (similar) (want!)

Earrings: F21 (similar) (um these are Downton Abbey and I want them)

Because the dress is interesting on its own I went reaaaaaaaally easy on the accessories. 

I won't lie: Getting home late and taking off this dress was almost as fun as putting it on. I changed into my husband's pajama pants and watched Brain Games with my kids before going to bed. I consider that a very successful Friday night indeed. 

Freaky Friday

 The other day I got the dreaded message that my C drive was too full, so I commenced cleaning out my computer. When I got to my Downloads folder, it was full of literally hundreds of pictures of bad fashion. Deleting them all was like a horrible walk down an ugly memory lane.

It was beautiful. But now it's time to refill that folder full of more crappy fashion. Luckily, I have awesome readers who alert me to atrocities. Thank you.

How can you look at these and not think "Sex Panther?" 

Marry me, Paul Rudd. 

(Thanks Lindsay!) 

 Brenda sent these wedges (?) over, which look like they're be super convenient when cleaning my house. 

 The Tin Man: So hot right now. 

Seriously. They're corrugated. I can't. 

 My favorite flash sale site is Zulily.com, because I can find great deals on cool and original clothes. But every once in a while, they have something like this and I go to the mall and want to look like everyone else. 

 Oh, are we showing what's on our insides on our clothes now? Because I need a shirt with a slice of pizza and like, five croissants on the belly. 

Fun fact: I don't actually need to see your anatomy to know your gender. I can usually just guess. I'm talented like that. 

 Oh hey there, Swiss Cowboy! How's that incredibly specific genre treating you?

 Lisa sent over this piece of "art," which looks like The Scarecrow from Batman and that dog from the Target commercials had a love child. 

My friend and I went shopping yesterday and were ALARMED at the comeback of palazzo pants. I feel like they're one of those things that comes around and people try it out and realize how horrific they are, so they go out of style until another couple of years later, someone is like "OMG I totally forgot about palazzo pants!" and they come back. 

 They're back.

Let's talk about reasons that palazzo pants are a bad idea:

-They flatter no one.

-They come in weird patterns. 

-They're always a smidgen too short. 

-We have maxi skirts now, so there's no point. 

-They always trick you into thinking they're a maxi skirt on the rack and that's shady. 

-YOU ARE A GROWN WOMAN. 

Don't get me started. 

And with that, I'm off. I'm pulling a Cinderella today: Starting with cleaning my house and ending with getting dressed for our annual hospital NICU benefit in an amazing dress that I will not be able to sit/eat/breathe in. I asked IG followers what shoes I should wear here and the black and white are winning. Any more opinions? 

The Rule of Three: Leather Jacket Edition

OK, let's get back to the clothes because you're here to talk about jeans, not my trip to Disneyland.

I am a compulsive shopper, in case you didn't realize. I've been a compulsive shopper since I was a teenager and got my glorious first job and with it, my first paycheque. There was a shoe store near my work and on break, my friend and I would walk over and shop. I think that job probably cost me money.

Because I KNOW I'm prone to making compulsive purchases (seriously, remember my neon stripe wedges from last year?) I try and follow what I call my "rule of three." Before I consider purchasing an item, I have to think up three outfits on the spot in which that item would work. I do this to make sure I'm not buying something just to buy something AND make sure that what I'm getting will actually work with the stuff I already own. Because there's no point in buying something you're not going to wear.

Therefore, I thought it would be a fun feature to do a "rule of three" post, showing three outfits using the very same item. I'm starting with a leather jacket but if you have any pieces you want to send my way, I'd be happy to throw some outfits together.

Now, first is the jacket itself. Start with some good bones -- everyone should have a good leather or faux leather jacket that has a feminine cut -- no boxiness. I like biker collars and moto is really cool too. And, while I might own a few jackets in bright colors, always start with a neutral. Black or tan are the most versatile colors, which mean you'll get the most use out of 'em. I have a red leather jacket that is adorable... and that I rarely ever wear.

Super Casual

American Eagle Outfitters pink shirt / Dorothy Perkins moto jacket / 
American Eagle Outfitters vintage jeans / Minnetonka studded flat / 
Croft Barrow shoulder bag / Mossimo Supply Co studded leather bracelet / 
Hive & Honey stud earrings / River Island lightweight scarve, $25 / Dorothy Perkins belt

Wearing a leather jacket with jeans and flats is practically a uniform for me. It's easy to change up the shirt and accessories, but the jacket finishes off the outfit and gives it a mucho coolness factor. This is something I'd wear running kids to school, grocery shopping and having lunch with friends. (Another reason I like neutral or tan leather -- it matches EVERYTHING).

Date Night

River Island print shirt, $27 / Dorothy Perkins biker jacket / Uniqlo tapered jeans /
Studded riding boots / Mango wedge heel ankle boots / Betsey Johnson heart purse /
2b beading jewelry / Pieces fish hook earrings, $37

I think we can all agree that leather jackets are basically too cool for school, which is why I wear one on practically every date night my husband and I go on. I like to dress up a little for dinner and a movie, so pairing a jacket with a graphic tank and black jeans is awesome. (Note: I like my leather pants, but a leather jacket with leather pants might make you look like a biker which is all well and good until you're kidnapped into a biker gang and then they find out you bought your jacket from Dorothy Perkins and things get awkward).

Boots for date night are my favorite. They're dressier than flats, but also don't cause faceplanting like heels might. Hey, I love heels, but if I can get away with looking dressy without 'em, I will.

Dressed Up

Dorothy Perkins classic black dress / Dorothy Perkins biker jacket / Spanx tight 
/ Black pointy toe pumps / ASOS flap handbag / 
White House Black Market hand crafted jewelry / Rhinestone stretch bracelet

Don't forget that a leather jacket is killer with dresses and skirts -- trust me. I especially super love them with girly patterns and colors, like pinks, grays and florals. If you're not into pencil dresses, this would look equally as adorable with an A-line skirt, too. Add some tights and closed-toe shoes because it's still March no matter what the swimsuit display at Forever 21 says, and you're good to go.

If you have any other pieces that you love but are super clueless on how to wear, send 'em to my email, which is over there on the right-hand side.

Seriously, if you don't have a leather jacket in your closet, you need to buy one. So versatile it's ridiculous. If you're still in the market for one, obviously Dorothy Perkins is a great place to start and they ship to the United States. Other jacket brands I love:
Guess 
Steve Madden
Calvin Klein (great options for plus sizes)
F21 for tight budgets
American Rag

Happy (non compulsive) Shopping!

February Roundup

Last night my parents took us out to dinner at Tucano's, a Brazilian BBQ place. It's where they just literally bring you skewers of meat and carve it onto your plate until you beg for mercy. I still feel full and just want to loaf around all day, so... I will. They're flying out this afternoon and that officially checks off everything I had on my packed calendar. Er... until Friday at least.

In the meantime, here's a quick recap of all the crap we did in February. Because, you know, inquiring minds and such.

First it was my little A's birthday - he turned five and is the man.

 Oh hey super stud. We had to go to church on his birthday and I felt bad so he got to wear a Batman ribbon. 

 I used to spend like, a day, making my kids' birthday cakes. They were these huge undertakings that usually involved several tiers and fondant. And then I realized that I hated it and stopped doing it. This took about 20 minutes and a Batman symbol I printed off of the computer. And lots of sprinkles. 

My daughter got a store-bought cake. Pinterest would be ASHAMED. 

The next weekend, we made our way to California, with a brief stop in St. George. We've been tossing around the idea of looking into condos down there, so we spent some time checking out models. But then also eating, swimming and shopping. 

We also went to the dino museum for the millionth time. 

My kids like it and therefore, we go. Here they are watching a scintillating cartoon video about fossils while I looked at Instagram. 

Excellent behavior, as always. 

When Justin wants to leave, he wants to leave. 

After our night in St. G (I'm starting a trend, let's all call it that) we broke the news to our kids that were going to Disneyland, which we had somehow manage to keep secret. 

Here was my daughter's reaction. 

She just has a lot of feelings. 

After that, it was off to DL.

Can I just talk for a minute about my mixed feelings about Disney? Being from Canada (Toronto is right above New York State) and have four brothers, we never went to Disneyland. It would have been too far and too expensive with our family. We did a lot of traveling, but it was mostly to Eastern Canada. SO I kind of always thought about DL as one of those "childhood" things that I'd missed out on. So naturally, when I had kids I felt like we needed to do it too. So we waited until we thought ours were the ideal age to go and finally booked the trip.

And I kind of thought it would be more magical. Like I'd sit back and think about how many special memories we'd make and our kids are only young once and blah blah feelings. But after three days I was kind of done and kind of glad it was over. Is that bad? Am I crappy human?

I'm glad we checked it off our parenting "to do" list but it will be a long while before I ever consider it again.

Stuff I liked:
-Our hotel. We stayed at the Paradise Pier and it was lovely and perfect and there was good room service and a pool that made my kids very happy. 

-Cars Land. My son is all about McQueen, so it was a big deal. And it was adorable. Also, we got the McQueen car on Radiator Springs Racers and I thought he might actually pass out. 

-California Adventure in general was cool. There was tons of stuff, shorter lines and a really good Chinese food place. I was a fan. 

Stuff I didn't like:

-Actual Disneyland. I thought it would be more spread out? Instead I felt like it was super congested and I got crazy claustrophobic. 

-The Roger Rabbit ride. Shoot me in the face. 

-The Bug's Life movie, which made my children scream and cry to the point that I thought Andrew was going to have a nervous breakdown and we'd have to invest in counseling. 

I feel grinchy admitting that it really wasn't my thing. Like I said, am I glad we did it once? Yeah. But we usually spend our vacations down in San Diego and I think we had as much, if not more, fun there. I think we're just lazy travelers. When I go on vacation, I want to go on vacation. The crowds were definitely not relaxing.

ANYWAY. Those are my thoughts on that. Moving on.

When we came home, my parents literally flew in that night. And of course, my kids were so excited that they stayed up until they got here. This is also when I lost my car keys, and spent two days looking for them, despite the fact that my 5-year-old repeatedly told me they were under the couch. 

Guess where they were.

THEN it was my daughter's birthday -- she turned a ripe old eight. My mom and I brought treats to her class and then my dad and Andrew met us at the school for lunch. Addie forgot that we were bringing her a lunch, so she accidentally bought one anyway. My dad gallantly offered to eat it and three seconds later he was asking another 2nd grader if he wanted to trade.

Yeah. 

We went out for dinner that night and neither of the kids had fully recovered. Here's an excellent picture of Andrew sleep-eating pizza. 

The next day, Addie was baptized, which is a big deal in our religion. One of the fun parts is that girls usually wear white dresses afterward. Addie was adamant that we go shopping so she could "say yes to the dress." We watch a lot of TLC around here.

Unfortunately, we found two dresses that she wanted to say "yes" to. So we bought both. And she wore both. 

First dress. 

 Second dress. 

We had all of our family and friends over for a big party afterward. My house has yet to completely recover. My mom thought it would be a good idea to decorate with Easter grass and I'm finding it EVERYWHERE. 

My parents are getting ready to leave right now. But they did have time to take my kids to the park.

 JK my kids took my dad to the park.

So that should explain my generally crappy blog for the month of February. Luckily, life will calm down and I can stop cursing the fact that ALTHOUGH I planned my children's age gap perfectly, Andrew was accidentally born super early and ruined everything and one month the year is a complete write-off. Thanks, buddy. 

So anyway, I wanted to get your thoughts on the whole DL thing. I have friends who LOVE it and I can see why, so I don't know why it wasn't the happiest place on earth for me.

Maybe it's because the title of "happiest place on earth" has already been filled. 

By my pillow. 

What I Wore: Home Again

You guys, I have literally not even signed into Blogger for the past two weeks. Life has been too bananas crazy. With family flying in, a trip to Disney and two birthdays, I am TOO glad to see February go and now I'm just happy to be home.

I am just getting into the swing of things now, but I've had to wake up uber early to get back on track and catch up. BUT! Since my mama is in town, I've been making her take outfit pics.

(Shh don't tell but I think my daughter is better)

My fam goes home tomorrow and I should be back tomorrow. I'll also do a roundup post of the happenings around here because let's face it, my personal blog is so neglected that this one has become personal too. So look forward to that.

I'm actually physically wearing this right now, which never happens. I grabbed this shirt in St. George last weekend and it is uber-soft. I wore it in California and looked like the ultimate tourist.

Moooooom you cut off my feet!! 

Tee: I bought this at a boutique, but you can find your state here.

Blazer: F21 (similar) (this too) (Love the cuffs)

Skinnies: Local boutique (I love Liverpool 4ever) (cheap!) (mmm mustard)

Boots: Frye duh (on sale again!!) (similar) (similar)

Seriously, now is an excellent time to stock up on boots. Just saying. And yeah, sorry, all of my outfits lately include these. I tell everyone I'm "breaking them in." 

My mom asked me if I was "trying to look smart" today. She loves me. 

I'm off to the races now. Like, not the real races because there's actually no gambling in Utah. Oh, you silly state.