Freaky Friday

 We woke up to about two feet of snow this morning. No joke, when I backed out of my driveway to go to workout (now THAT's dedication) the snow was up to my Tahoe's windows. So excuse me if I just send my kids out to play while I watch through the windows. Being a mom makes me understand my own moms parenting methods more. She had a strict "Go outside and don't come back in until it gets dark or you're bleeding" policy. Well played, mom. Well played.

Anyway, I have plans to go nowhere or do nothing until at least my roads get plowed. Oh, the joys of living on the side of a mountain.

 This coat (sent to me by Andrea) was labeled as "The Official Bear Coat." Like, I don't want to be oversensitive about this, but uh, did anyone talk to the BEARS about this? Because I'm not sure this is what they want representing them as a species. Especially because this coat looks like it's saying "Who, me?"

 Photoshop: You're doing it wrong.

Either that or there's an alien species of pants models I'm unaware of.

 These are the "Apricot Splatter" tights AKA it was my first time shaving my legs.

Thanks to all of the ladies over at Babycenter who alerted me to this especially heinous jumpsuit. Floppy boobs, short legs and a crotch seam? Don't mind if I do. 

 My friend Sara sent me this lovely array of teddy bear themed workout gear. Because nothing says "I'm serious about fitness" quite like teddy bears sewn onto your shoulders. Like, I DARE someone to wear this. Please. Just do it for me?

She also sent me this dress. Look closely. It's made of rainbow keyboard keys. Luckily no one would wear it IRL.

 Except a pregnant Amber Rose. Oh honey. Honey honey honeychild. Delete that. 

S sent me this dress, which she kindly pointed out looked lie a deranged Pan-Am flight attendant. I love it when readers do my work for me.

"Um, excuse me? My eyes are UP HERE." 

(Thanks Jade!)

Who else is calling it a snow day today? It's OK if you live somewhere that doesn't even get snow. You can call it a snow day by proxy. We're friends.

Cozying Up with Tights in the Winter

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of No nonsense for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

So I woke up this morning to frigid temps. I mean like, Canada frigid. Back when I lived in Canada I remember mornings that were so cold it literally felt your bones were frozen and somehow this weather has followed me to Utah. Usually I brag that Utah has really short, mild winters, but this year we've had like four feet of snow and below zero temps. Wanna know what that means?

That I get to go shopping.

Because the clothes that I usually wear all winter are nowhere near warm enough now. I've loaded up on sweaters, a new parka, pants and then, No nonsense was kind enough to send me a few pairs of No nonsense tights and leggings to wear. Thank goodness, because I've absolutely used them anytime I've needed to wear a skirt or dress.

I got both the cable knit tights and the brown leggings and have been coming up with infinite ways to wear 'em. I love that an outfit looks  cozier and more fashion-forward with tights -- I think it's the texture that does it. I tend to dress preppy and they're perfect with boot socks and a kahki skirt for casual wear and so I don't freeze my legs off.

Check out these cute outfits!

Long sleeve sweater / H&M short jacket, $49 / Corduroy pants / Charlotte Russe slouch cowgirl boots / Bench logo bag, $41 / Necklace / Antique gold ring / Dorothy Perkins

I love tights with a knit dress. It's so cozy and like, adorable snow bunny without being too bulky.

I've been wearing mine with sportier stuff like this.

Yumi , $29 / Hollister Co. long sleeve t shirt / Old Navy skirt / Cable knit stocking / Kitten heels / Nine West cross body handbag / Leather watch / Topshop

I wore mine with boots and a stripe-y rugby shirt and it dressed down the fact that I was wearing a skirt in the middle of winter. WIN!

Anyway, No nonense has a ton of different styles and colors. Bonus? You can grab them pretty much wherever  -- grocery store, drug store, mass retailers, you name it -- and they're cheap! Such a fast, easy way to change up an outfit without buying a whole wardrobe. Not that I would do that or anything.... cough.

Check out their new line and their partnership with expert Jill Martin by liking No nonsense on Facebook and keeping in touch on Twitter. She's a style guru who did "Ambush Makeover" and author of "I Have Nothing to Wear!" Meanwhile, I'll be burying myself in a pile of blankets and blasting a space heater on my feet.

Jae Raids the Drugstore

Yes, it's that time again. That time when I expose my extreme shopping addiction to the world by detailing my latest guilty pleasures purchased from random stores nearest you. Yes, I love my department store mascara, but there's just something about a cheap lipstick that makes everything feel right with the world. Here are my favorite cheapie products from the last month or so! Click through to purchase... some I'm just using the Google shopping link so you can find the best dealzzzzz. Yes those z's were necessary.

 So Mary Kay sent me some products to try out recently. Right out the gate, I wasn't a fan of this Lash Love Mascara... I felt like it made my lashes really thin. Then, I had the bright idea to layer it over my usual Diorshow mascara. Um, amazing. It makes it look like I'm wearing falsies allll the time. So my new idea is to do a volume mascara first and a lengthening second. Brilliant!

 They also sent me this gloss, called NouriShine. I like it, especially in Red Passion. My friends and I were just talking about how wearing red lipstick is stressful because you're just worried about how it looks all night, but in a gloss? SO much easier. I'm a fan. 

 

So when winter hits, my hands go from small and childlike to decrepit and old. Thanks, dry air! After cleaning my house, they were SO bad. Equals why I shouldn't clean my house. Anyway, I headed over to Bath and Body Works and grabbed some of this Rose Salve for like, $5. It has been my savior this winter. I slather it on all of the rough spots and then....

 ... coat my hands in this stuff (Aveeno Daily Moisturizing). It's definitely taken care of the problem and people can go back to mistaking my hands for a 5 year old's again. Huzzah!

I ran out of bronzer after my last trip to Canada and I haaaate going bronzer-less. I grabbed this at like, WalMart or something and I'm in love. It's Physician's Formula
Bronzing Veil. What I love is that it holds the powder in a reserve and you use the dial to say how much you want. Takes all the guess work out. I also love that it's not like, offensively shimmery. I don't want to look like I'm heading to a beach party in January, thanks.

Along with dry winter hands comes dry winter hair, which then gets staticky and then gets stuck in my car door.  Oh the rage. Which is why I'm glad my friend introed me to Moroccan oil. Every year me and a group of friends have a "Favorite Things" party at Christmas and we all swap and this is what I brought home. SO happy I did. A teeny dab of this while blow-drying makes my hair smooth and I use it when my hair feels dry and sticky-uppy, which is totally a word. I also use it on my daughter's hair when it's all crazy. It's been a lifesaver. This is the brand I have, but you can find it just about anywhere.

I was Target shopping with my mom and I picked up this e.l.f. Beauty Book. I say "Target shopping" because it's not like regular shopping. I believe you make poor financial choices in Target. I don't know why. But this was like, $5 and it has served me well. Especially over the holidays, when I was doing more dramatic eyes. I love love the bronze-y shades. 

That's it for this month -- have any beauty finds you wanna share with me?

What I Wore: Remix w/ Liverpool Jeans!

 I am aware that I've already worn this blazer and these boots in other posts. But I can't be original ALL THE TIME people. Sometimes I repeat. Especially right before Christmas, when these pictures were taken. It was one of those days where I had to shop, cook and attend a party all in one day. Blazers are definitely my go-to for busy days like that because I can throw them on over what is clearly just a polo and look polished.

Also, Liverpool Jeans were kind enough to send me a couple of pairs of their awesome-fitting jeans. I heart these! I can't say enough about the fit. And! They said they'd give a pair to a lucky reader, so there will be a giveaway next week. I have another outfit to show you with the other pair of dee-vine skinnies they sent me. The coolest part? The jeans have Beatles lyrics printed on the inside! These ones have "Let It Be," which happens to be my favorite Beatles song. Stay tuned for next week's giveaway!

 

 Blazer: Bluenotes (Canada)
Polo: Tommy Hilfiger
Jeans: c/o Liverpool Jeans

Boots: Soda

I was going for like, a preppy outdoorsman vibe here. Nailed it! Brown jeans and a blazer -- who knew?

 OK, so here's my question: What pieces do you find yourself reaching for again and again?

Freaky Friday

I had the worrrrst night last night. A neighborhood dog barked for literally four hours straight and I could not sleep. I should note that I'm a dog person and I love them, but not when they continually bark and ruin my night. I ended up out on the couch with my noise canceling headphones on at 4am. It was awesome. So I'm feeling a little off today. I apologize if I'm not as snarky as usual. My snark needs 8 hours of sleep to be really effective.

Heather sent me this very expensive Dolce and Gabbana bag that basically looks like the gross blanket that your grandma always keeps on the back of her sofa and that always smells like Cheetos.

 I can't decide what this looks like more. Carpet, or Harry's van from Dumb and Dumber. Either way, I don't want it near my crotch. 

 What? Owls are hot right now, right?

PS Owls are one thing that I do not get whatsoever. Like, I can see how they're cute, but I wouldn't want one in my house. For one, I'm scared of birds. For two, is it me or do owls seem kind of judgey? Like, you don't know my life owl!

 Alison sent me a huge collection of really sad fashion. And I chose this, because nothing is quite as sad as acid wash fringe. 

 Well that's subtle and ladylike.

PS Shoemaker, I can see that you just put a glove on a shoe and I think that's lazy.

 K first of all, I thought this was Gwyneth Paltrow and automatically hated it because I really, really dislike anyone who exercises four hours a day and eats baby food while recommending you buy a $4,000 snood. But when I realized that it wasn't GP, I decided that regardless, I hate Barbie tracksuits. Like, I didn't know they existed until 5 minutes ago, but I already know I hate them. 

 This is the ugliest ring ever, but it might stop me from biting my nails. 

 My youngest brother sent me this hoodie. 

I thought it would be good for those of you whose husbands have gained a little weight over the years. Zip it up and suddenly it's your college boyfriend! 

Of course, he'll have to keep it on always, which could get awkward. 

Lauren sent me this headband. I think it would be cool to buy this and wear it to like, parent-teacher conferences and act completely natural. Like "Oh this old thing?"

This purse disturbs me deeply. Wanna know why?

Because one night, I had the brilliant idea to watch Pan's Labyrinth on my own.

Cue sobbing in the fetal position. 

Nooooooooooooo oooooooo oo

And with that being said, I think I'm going to curl up in the fetal position, but because I'm tired and only slightly terrified that I actually had to Google a picture of the scariest thing of all time.

Happy Friday naps to everyone!

Christmas Dish!

Ahhh getting back from holidays is a little sad, but kind of refreshing as well. I feel like I crave a little routine, as referenced by my nearly eating my husband's head when he suggested we go to the store in the middle of the day yesterday. It was naptime!

So we're all back to normal in my house, Christmas has been taken down and kids packed off to school. And, after taking two weeks off, I went to work out today and nearly barfed. Christmas food was not good to me.

Fun story time though! So I usually get really good Christmas presents from my hubs. He told me that it's because he's so Scrooge-y the rest of the year that he makes up for it at Christmas. I won't say that I agree because that would be mean of me. WINK. So I get excited for Christmas because I love love love watching my kids dive in and because I know I'm going to get something good because my hubs has excellent taste. 

Of course, my husband only shops online. Which has never been a problem. Still, he ordered all of my stuff a couple weeks in advance and then kept tracking it to see when it would get to our house. For some reason, the packages kept getting delayed, but they were guaranteed to get to our house on Christmas Eve. I host a party at my house that day, so I was home waiting around for packages while cleaning and cooking. Still nothing. When everyone went home and it was time to open Christmas PJs, my entire Christmas -- we are talking 11 things -- didn't make it. So my husband called UPS. That's when we found out that the driver had just marked them all undeliverable and went home for the day. Awesome.

Luckily, I really do love Christmas for the kids, so we made the 25th all about them. My husband literally went to the distribution center to pick up the packages on the 26h because there was no way he was sending them on the truck again. SO I had a late Christmas, but it was totally OK! He did good and I'm decked out in all of the pretty things he picked out for me.

Want pics? OK! 

 My kidlets in their Christmas pajamas... we usually change into them and then head to go look at our local Festival of Lights. Such traditionalists. 

 Christmas Eve is not kind to me. I'm busy all day. But I did get this Day-Glo hoodie to wear with my PJs so I was OK with it. They were one of the few things that weren't botched by UPS... because we bought them at the mall. 

 A bird's eye of what my house looked like before we headed to bed at 2am Christmas Eve. My husband put my daughter's dollhouse together completely wrong. I started setting it up and was like "Um, why is there a piano in the bathroom?" He had to take it apart while I did fun things like organize prezzies under the tree. 

Without fail, every year my husband tells me to stick to my budget and then it gets blown to pieces the week before Christmas. I just gave up and went with it. 

 And, after all that taking apart and putting back together again, my daughter's fave gift wasn't the dollhouse -- but the bow and arrow my son picked out for her. Le sigh. 

I quickly forgave the late presents when they came in these pretty boxes -- I got a new handbag and wallet, both of which I desperately needed. He also bought me a bunch of things that I've posted on the blog for shopping guides. Smart guy.

So, it was a good, if not weirdly spread-out Christmas. Just made it last longer, right?

I also got a ton of AWESOME Freaky Friday submissions over the holidays, so I'll be back on Friday with those. Meanwhile, I have work and episodes of Downton to catch up on. My husband also got me a swanky pair of noise-cancelling headphones so I can ignore my kids while watching. No, I haven't seen the Christmas Special... but I know it's sad. Don't tell me!

Freaky Friday: Pinterest Finds

Yay it is SO CLOSE to Christmas you guys. I'm behind on stuff, but when does that not happen. It seems like every time I think I have a day to catch up on things, I end up having something that completely derails any progress. However, today will not be one of those days. I shall get it all done and clean my house to boot. Oh, what's that? I should get off the computer then? I Agree. But it's Freaky Friday time first. This is all stuff that was found in the underbelly of Pinterest. There are so many good ideas, yet so much scariness there too.

 This post is bought to you by Camo Formal, which is apparently a real thing. I'm sorry, are you getting married in the forest? Why would camo be necessary at a wedding? Are you trying to allude your guests? Is there paintball? WHERE AM I?

Thanks to Rachael, who said "Rachael said, "I was on Pinterest and found this wedding dress for the hunter in all of us. I threw up."

Indeed, Rachael. Indeed. 

 Nothing rattles my chains quite like a peeptoe boot. For when your legs are cold but your toes are toasty warm.

 ...Unless it's a laced boot with a sandal foot.

 If your Grandma's knee-high reinforced tights were a really unflattering swimsuit.

 Have you finished shopping for your husband yet? If not, can I suggest that you dress him up like a lumberjack lady? Even the model for this looks like "Don't....say......a word...."

 This. This is why leopard print gets a bad rap. Because these shirts are made and then worn to bars and then used as a way for 50-year-old women to pick up 20-something guys. OMG have you guys seen "Extreme Cougar Wives?"

Uh... yeah. Me neither.

 It's the Inception of sweaters. We need to go deeper! More sweaters on sweaters!!

Ooh, I finally found the perfect outfit to wear to all those Christmas parties! Wait, did I say Christmas parties? I meant an I Wish I Had a Sandwich and I Dream of Jeannie Fan Club party. 

 There is no way to say this nicely. Homegirl looks like she's been rolling in hotdogs. I'm sorry.

 Speaking of needing sandwiches. I feel like we need to have like, a movement of people who run around feeding models. And then I could be like "Sandwich Squad! Assemble!" and everyone would head straight to their nearest Subway and throw sandwiches at people who are wearing Spanx as pants like this lady.

 Graphic sweaters are super in right now. But SpongeBob Droopy Crotch is a good look for no one.

Another gift idea for your man. If Ronald McDonald was deeply metro. Ooh, myabe I could introduce him to hotdog girl?


Alright, I'm singing (aka signing - another famous typo from moi) off for the week -- I'll be taking next week off for Christmas vacation AKA lying around in bed eating leftoevers and reading in my pajamas. Ohhhh yeah.

Merry Christmas everyone!