Freaky Friday

Friday, April 22, 2011

Ohh I know how much you missed a good Freaky Friday! Every time I go looking for ugly clothes, they all remind me of weird things and then I have to Google image the weird things they remind me of. Then I get super distracted and three hours later, a post is born.



I was at the zoo last week and for some reason I picture this in the small animal house, in a terrarium. With dads taking pictures while the moms say "ewwww" and try to direct their kids to the koala bears.


Now, Nicole Sherzinger ... Schriezing... whatever her name might be is a perfect example of a pretty girl made ugly by hair and makeup. I don't even care that she's wearing her workout clothes because she's stumping for Reebok here, but OMG what is up with her horns? And why does her face take up so much of her head? Can't... stop.... looking.


Just in case you were wondering what goes with your shrunken tribal bustier. Pantaloons. The answer is always pantaloons.


Ohhh that's what I forgot to add to my outfit today. Oven mitts!

(They're so hot right now)

HAH! See what I did there? I couldn't stop my fingers from typing that if I glued them to my desk.


Possibly the world's most unflattering pair of pants. First of all, they start at the neck. Then add a droopy drawstring, some shine and the world's largest crotch. Then throw $245 into a wood chipper in front of nine starving babies. Fashion is silly.


So this is the side view of a handbag. I couldn't even get to the front view, because all I could see was a certain friend.


WILSON!!!! They've made you into a sequined purse? WHY!? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.


I am changing the name of this blog to "How Not to Look Thin." And every day I'll just post this dress. Until the end of time.


You know, at first I was like ew, what an ugly and unnecessary shirt. But then I got to thinking. As a girl who was not blessed with ample lady lumps, it may be helpful to have a shirt like this for informational and locating purposes. As in "Yes, the left boob is right HERE."



Girls wearing loincloths are creepy to me.



Remember when we talked about wearing florals without looking like an old timey plantation owner? Please remember this the next time you're in the market for a floral romper that is too short. I don't know WHY you would be in the market for a floral romper that is too short, but it never hurts to be prepared.


I am always down with a shirt that makes you look hairier overall. Also, are the ears really necessary?

Elise sent this to me over on the Facebook fan page (check the right sidebar) and I was so excited. You see, I am a huge King of Queens fan, so naturally it reminded me of Carrie's Christmas sweater.


So I dug around and found a picture of it, laughed for a while and then mourned the loss of that show.


Then, when I was googling "Giraffe sweaters" I found this and laughed even harder.

And that, my friends, is why my Freaky Friday posts are always late.

6 comments:

Stephanie said...

okay, so the sequined purse....Wilson was not the "friend" I thought you were talking about! My thoughts were roaming a little dirtier, lol!

Jae said...

Sometimes I have the urge to say "That's what she said" at really inappropriate times. Like in church. Great minds think alike!

Misty said...

My distraction is reading your blog and laughing my guts out. I'm supposed to be writing a website right now. Instead I'm googling where to find the shirt that shows people where your boobs are. Even if those boobs only exist thanks to Victoria's Secret Miracle Bras.

Jennifer @ A Fine Romance said...

That was seriously the funniest post I have read in forever! Bravo! HAHA! I loved it! Who would wear those things? Must be fit for runway...

Anonymous said...

May I just say that I love your blog!! I'm so glad I stumbled acrossed it!! Your freaky Friday comments are hilarious!! Thanks for the laughs!!

stephiloo said...

Those boots are purrrfect for my Halloween costume. I think half my closet is stuff that was "perfect" for this costume or that costume at one time or another, but can't bring myself to wear in public when it's not Halloween, or a themed party...

Pages

Powered by Blogger.
Related Posts with Thumbnails
Blog contents © How Not to Dress Like A Mom 2010. Blogger Theme by Nymphont.