Sorry, Freaky Friday, We Gots a Giveaway Instead

Thursday, March 11, 2010

****GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED. STAY TUNED FOR FUTURE GIVEAWAYS AND THANKS FOR ENTERING!****




Still looking for some Freaky Friday goodness?

Fine! Geez, don't be so pushy.

Yup, this is a sock monkey shoe. Would you hate me if I said I kind of wanted it? IT WOULD MATCH MY DONKEY MITTENS.

Worst freaky friday post EVER.

The Social Networking Site Known as Bookface


...anyone?

Sorry, I really have a thing for Jim Halpert.

Anyhow, just wanted to let you attractive people know that I now have a *dum da da dum!* Facebook page. If you're looking for daily ramblings about fashion, such as "Why is it that every spring people find it socially acceptable to wander around dressed like an Easter egg?" and "Considering camouflage pants... yay or nay?" then you must join. We will discuss and be friends.

Also, I am SO excited to have my first giveaway tomorrow. Woop woop! It's a good one too. Check back tomorrow for the deets. Then we will discuss and be well-dressed friends.

So, if you're on facebook, or bookface, check me out here and let's be BFF's.

Best Supporting Role: Your Bra

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

So I just spent the weekend shopping like a banshee (do banshees really shop? Let's try that again)...er, shopping like a Hilton, with my best friend. She was great, and totally talked me out of stupid purchases like a $30 t-shirt and into good purchases, like a $10 cardigan.

While we were out and about (or oot and aboot, seeing as we were on Canadian soil) she was mentioning that she needed to buy new bras since she just had her sweet, adorable and cute son a mere four months ago (she's totally going to read this and be like WTH Jae! Stop talking about my rack on the interwebs! Whatever, she knew what she was getting into when she became friends with me) and her need for new bras inspired an entire post dedicated to the unsung heroes, otherwise known as your bras.

I don't know about you, but my bras are perpetually HAMMERED. I find one I like, wear it religiously for like, six months until it is gray and hanging by threads and generally disgusting. So when I buy a bra, I BUY A BRA. I research it and try on a bajillion until I find THE ONE that I can abuse for awhile.

I suggest you do the same. A bra is the one piece of clothing that you will wear every day, so you'd better make sure that it fits right, doesn't pinch or poke, and above all, LOOKS GOOD.

Depending on your size and shape, you'll need a different type of bra. Before you run off to your friendly neighborhood Victoria's Secret, make sure that you get yourself measured, ideally before you start trying bras on. Weight gain, having a baby, and plain old gravity will have a bearing on the size of your bazookas, so EVERY time you go bra shopping after a span of six months to a year, get resized. Please. And when trying on bras, remember to always place the hooks on the middle eyes so you get the best fit, and move around in the bra to test if it's pinchy or pokey before you make the decision. And, try on bras that work for your body type.



The Handful

If you're like me and were blessed with a less than VS model amount of boobage, a molded cup is the way to go. It'll give you a better shape and much better proportions. Just because you *could* go without a bra, doesn't mean you should. Also, choosing one with girly deets like this frill here can give you a little more dimension up top and fool the eye into thinking there is more there. Plus, it's really pretty.


The Wanderer

After having babies and nursing, you're likely to notice that your girls aren't quite as high as they used to be. Ideally, they should fall at the midpoint between your underarm and elbow, so when you try on bras make sure that they bring them back up. A push up is for you, my friend, as long as it has a thick and supportive band to hold you in. Make sure that the band isn't creating scary back rolls... if it is, go up a band size and keep the cup the same.

The More Than Enougher

To the lucky ladies who have generous proportions when it comes to boobage, choose a full coverage bra. Don't worry if the cups look big... you'll STILL have cleavage and your body will get a better shape. Pick a pretty one for extra good feelings. For special occasions, step away from the push up! You'll look like your boobs are staging death by suffocation. Try a demi cup instead, which is like a half-cup that can give you a really pretty neckline without scaring the children.

The Night on the Town

You should definitely have a convertible bra. There is nothing I hate more than exposed bra straps with the wrong outfit. It looks trashy any way you look at it. Don't be lazy and grab a bra that can be used with regular straps, strapless, racerback, halter, whatever. It's a good investment to have in your lingerie collection simply so I won't make judgments about you.



The Non-Ugly Gym Goer

Remember how we talked about ugly gym clothes and how they make me cry? Same goes for ugly sports bras. YOU MUST buys a sports bra to workout. Regular bras will not cut it through all of the moving and whatnot. And look how pretty this one is!!

K, so I purposely didn't include the brands and sites to get these ones because unless it's the same bra that you already own in the same size you have, you should not be ordering bras online. GO TO THE STORE. Try them on. I know it's slightly uncomfortable, but most lingerie stores have lovely lighting. You'll be fine, I promise.

Maternity Monday - Cardigans

Monday, March 8, 2010

Last week, I talked about showing off the baby bump. This week, I'm going to totally contradict myself. Yes, sometimes you feel cute and want to show off the basketball you're hiding under your shirt, but other times, not so much. You feel like a big swollen blob and just want to throw on a muumuu or giant shapeless t-shirt and crawl into bed with an entire box of Girl Scout Cookies.

The best thing to do when you're having a fat day is to still try to look cute! Just because you want to hide under your clothes doesn't mean you have to look like a fashion train wreck. There are perfectly acceptable ways to hide your body without compromising on cuteness.

Enter the cascading cardigan. Last winter I bought a bunch of cascading cardigans in different colors. And for way cheap because that's how I roll. They're non-maternity, but work great while pregnant. The cardigans in the picture below are from a maternity store, but there is absolutely no need to spend money on a maternity cardigan when you can just buy a regluar one pretty much anywhere. (Seriously, mine are all from good old Ross.) These things provide plenty of room.
Motherhood Maternity

The key to pulling off this look is to make sure the rest of your outfit is somewhat form fitting. Don't pair a cascading cardigan with baggy jeans or a loose fitting skirt. If you're going to have volume on your top half, you need something tight on your lower half. This look works with skinny jeans, boot cut jeans, or even a pencil skirt.
Remember the cinchy belts we talked about last week? Well, one day, I walked by a store that had a mannequin in the window that was wearing a cascading/drape cardigan with a cinchy belt over it. I thought...hmmm, I'll try it. I wish I could have found a picture to show you, but I couldn't, so you'll just have to use your imagination. Mmkay?
Start with a drapy cardigan like this one. Make sure it doesn't have a ton of extra volume. Then pair it with a belt like this, right under the bustline. I know, it's kind of hard to imagine. Just trust me.
Another way to semi-hide your baby bump is with a scarf. Obviously, it won't really hide it. BUT, what it will do is draw attention elsewhere. Throw on a plain white tee, preferably one that fits snuggly, and accessorize with a cute scarf.
Forever 21

Voila! People will be admiring your cute scarf instead of your expanding waistline. Just make sure you read Jae's post about scarves before you go for this look. Otherwise you might end up looking like a lost cowgirl like I once did.

What? I Can Be Nice...

Tuesday, March 2, 2010



Dear Lady Gaga:

I think you look uncharacteristically pretty in this ad for MAC Cosmetics.

Do you know what would be even prettier?

PANTS.

That goes doubly for you, Cyndi Lauper. This is not 1983 and you are too old for onesies.

Kisses,

Jae

**EDIT!

My brother who is a motivational speaker just released this video with quite possibly the BEST Lady Gaga impersonation I've ever seen. Clearly, our love for her runs in the family. Ch-check it out here.

Maternity Monday: Silhouettes

Monday, March 1, 2010

Hi everyone! My name is Nathaly and I'm the new preggo. In case you're wondering, that's Natalie, not NaTHaly. My Colombian parents threw in a silent H just to mess with me. I'm about 26 weeks pregnant with my third child (a girl), and have two hyper boys ages 4 and 2. I've got a degree in Radio and Television Communications (yeah, super useful) and am currently a stay at home mom and wannabe photographer. I know. Who isn't? I'm so excited to be doing Maternity Monday!

For me, looking cute while preggo is all about the silhouette and showing off the baby bump. Right now I'm at the phase where nothing fits anymore, but maternity tops are still too big. I wear a lot of non-maternity clothes that are a size or two bigger, but sometimes they just don't fall right. Take this dress for example:

It stretches all weird over the belly and doesn't look flattering. The solution? A well-placed belt.
Much better silhouette.

The belt is just one of those cinchy belts I used to wear on the smallest part of my waist when I still had one. Now I just wear it right up under the bust line. I do this with shirts that have no shape, dresses that are little too big, or just to jazz up an outfit. Obviously, this won't work for everyone. I can still do this because 1) I'm still early enough in my pregnancy that I have some room under my bust line, and 2) I carry low. If I carried higher, a belt would probably drive me crazy.

The belt in the pics above came from WetSeal. I couldn't find it online, but they have the same one in black at Forever21.
Anything wider would get uncomfortable, so look for belts that are more narrow and don't have a huge buckle.

Like I said, this tip also works for loose fitting shirts. Here are a couple of shirts that could be belted to show off that baby bump silhouette.

I love the color of this shirt from Old Navy. But in my current stage of pregnancy, this shirt would look like a tent on me. So I'd pair it with jeans and belt it with something like this:Love the two buckles. (Charlotte Russe) I own one similar to this in brown that has 4 buckles. It's quite pirate-y. I wouldn't recommend that. This stretchy belt from Charlotte Russe would also work with the shirt above. It's completely elastic which equals comfort.

Here's another Old Navy shirt that would be cute jazzed up with a belt.



I'd pair it with a pop of color like so:Cute! Another favorite color of mine. (Forever21)

If you carry high and the belt thing won't work for you, worry not. Just look for shirts with a seam under the bustline.



The seam will give your curves a more flattering shape. (Old Navy)

I also love the idea of a cute sash that can be tied in a bow.


(Both from Motherhood Maternity.) I love this last one. If my black pencil skirt still fit, I'd be buying this and wearing it to church on Sunday with some red heels. But if I try to squeeze into it, I'll surely bust a seam. Time to get a maternity pencil skirt! Hmmm, I'm off to talk to the hubster about arranging a little "me time" for some shopping.

Freaky Friday

Friday, February 26, 2010

Yay Friday! It's my daughter's birthday weekend, so I have to get moving. Did I ever tell you never to have two children in the same birth month? What a terrible, terrible idea. I so want this over.

THEN! I'm going to see my best friend in Canada on Thursday (so you're going to have to do without a Freaky Friday posting) because I will be here. No biggies, it's just my shopping MECCA and I haven't been in like ten years. And it's not like I've been socking money away in my secret shopping account that my husband doesn't know about so I can blow it all on a marathon shopping spree or anything.

Anyhow, onto the post!



I feel like Lady Gaga is going to read my blog and be like "YES! Yes! I have been looking everywhere for an amoeba dress! Thank you, Jae. You've inadvertently helped your greatest enemy." And then she'll snap her fingers, and her tiny purple little people assistants (which I can only assume she has) will run off to their secret golden sewing room and make one while listening to "Bad Romance" on replay, after which she'll pay them in spankings.

Gaga ooh la la, indeed.

There are so many things wrong with this vest. It a SHAWL COLLAR, GREEN CHENILLE, KANGAROO POCKET vest, people. Why even buy this? Just go ahead and sign up for the PTA craft swap now.


Ugh, AGAIN with the harem pants. Am I the only one who thinks they just make you look like you have droopy saddlebags?


But, just in case harem pants aren't enough, invest in a whole harem outfit. You know what? I can respect this as a complete and utter commitment to dressing badly.

PS, where would you even wear this??

Don't you hate it when you're rushing out the door, kids, keys and phone in hand, you get to our kid's school and step out to drop him off, only to realize you've totally forgotten to put on PANTS? So embarrassing, right? Don't worry. It happens to the best of us.


Could this smack anymore of Paula Deen and meatloaf? Sweet mother. Also, I heard Paula Deen was going to be a guest judge on American Idol. WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO OUR SOCIETY?


K, are the horseshoes even necessary? I fell like they are just a smidgen too literal.


My awesome cousin in Canada sent me this gem. Get ready for this.

It's a bra.

With prepasted nipples.

So you can look cold all of the time, yet still have the support of a good bra.

Like Demi Moore, on the cover of G.I. Jane.

It was $2000. Or $2,200, for my Canadian friends.

JGFSJHG@#MFKJHGLKJ.

Sorry, that was me hitting my head against the computer.

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