Freaky Friday: Worst 2012 Trends

 Alright, first up is the winner of the Liverpool Jeans giveaway. Head on over to Liverpool's Facebook page at 11am PST to see who gets the skinnies!


 Hey friends! Or at least, people who were my friends until I offended them with this post. Seriously, yesterday I posted about hating bubble necklaces on my Facebook page and I lost two fans over it. I'M SORRY OK? Still, I decided to keep up the streak and post about all the things I hated in fashion last year. It'll help me start 2013 with less rage, I promise.

 K, well I still don't like bubble necklaces. They started with J.Crew and while I love J.Crew I dislike the bandwagon it creates.

 

However, I'm not adverse to Buble necklaces, which reader Jenifer alerted me to. Oh, we have fun on Facebook. I would like these necklaces to become the new fashion blogger piece du jour. Make it happen!

 Harem pants flatter no one. You should never look like you're packing this much weight in your pants. Like, ever. It's suspicious.

 Of course, then there are rompers. Because fully disrobing to go to the washroom is like, so hot right now.

Then, when a romper and harem pants have a love child, I lose all faith in humanity. This model looks far too happy for me. Hey lady -- your outfit is going to be in a pile on the floor of a public bathroom in a mall. Stop smiling so much.

 Hi-lo skirts... especially ones that are this obvious and OB/GYN friendly... offend me. If it can be described as a mullet, it's not for you. EVER.

 Hey, I love me a little pattern mixing. But I mean like, two patterns. Going all koo-koo-kachoo with it and then acting serious is crazypants. It makes you look like a colorblind elf.

I hate when summer rolls around and people start attending music festivals dressed like they're going to Woodstock. Girl, you weren't even alive during Woodstock. You know what I wear to festivals? Pants and a sense of dignity. 

Ugh Lennon glasses are gross. They make everyone look like they have bushman eyebrows. And please don't send me unhappy emails for making fun of both Lennon and Yoko Ono in the space of a month. I won't respond because I'm too busy watching this excellent piece of performance art.

 Sheer skirts. WHY. I have a hard enough time deciding what I'm going to wear without worry about how my undies match.

 Socks and heels. Because you're a short and confused 4 year old.

 I am SO OVER the shaved side hair. I see it way too often, even here in uber-Conservative Utah. It's like ugh, if you want to be rebellious can't you just like buy a motorcycle and rob a bank or something? PS growing this out will be heinous I'm just trying to think ahead.


Alright, sound off. What was your most hated trend? Do you think I'm a jerk. Are you going to defriend me on Facebook? Because I don't think I can take any more of that rejection.

What I Wore: Back in Black + A Giveaway!

So on Friday after I hung out and hid from the snow all day, I started feeling all like, haggy and gross. So I talked my hubs into taking me to dinner and a movie when he got home so I had a reason to actually change out of my sweats for the day. YAY! My fave black skinnies from Liverpool were clean. So I took a picture the end.

Please note that I didn't title this post "50 Shades of Grey" because LITERALLY every fashion blogger ever has done a post wearing gray called "50 Shades of Grey." And we all know I"m not a *real* fashion blogger, so I'll stick to AC/DC, thank you.

OMG, that reminds me -- did anyone watch The Bachelor and that sloppy girl who was obsessed with 50 Shades? And that girl who backflipped out of the limo and fell on her face? I died.

Wait, that also reminds me. Did anyone watch Miss America? The talent portion made my husband so uncomfortable that he had to leave the room and then one of the contestants accidentally said that marijuana should *only* be used recreationally. It was so awesome.

PS I watch a lot of bad TV and then sit around waiting for someone to ask me about it.

Jeans: c/o Liverpool Jeans
Boot socks: Abercrombie
Boots: Breckelle's
Tank: F21
Cardi: Gap
Scarf: Cotton On
Watch: xoxo

Just kidding that's not the end. I wore a ton of layers because the movie theater we always go to usually basically has ice on the walls it's so cold. Luckily I had the toasty warm butter on my popcorn to keep me warn. So.... buttery... heart attack... dead... worth it. 

So, I promised a giveaway and a giveaway you shall have. Liverpool Jeans, who sent me two of my most favoritest pairs of jeans ever, is willing to give away a pair of colored skinnies to a lucky reader! Seriously, these jeans are boss. They fit like a glove and are very true to size. I did that thing where you get a size and then pray with all of your might that they'll fit and then do a massive happy dance when they do. What? You don't do that? For shame. 

Check it! Just like 'em on Facebook, comment over there and then follow them on Pinterest and you are dunzo!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


The winner will be announced on Friday at 11am! So enter. Enter, my friends. Get your colored pants!

(US and Canadian residents only pretty please?)

 

Freaky Friday

 We woke up to about two feet of snow this morning. No joke, when I backed out of my driveway to go to workout (now THAT's dedication) the snow was up to my Tahoe's windows. So excuse me if I just send my kids out to play while I watch through the windows. Being a mom makes me understand my own moms parenting methods more. She had a strict "Go outside and don't come back in until it gets dark or you're bleeding" policy. Well played, mom. Well played.

Anyway, I have plans to go nowhere or do nothing until at least my roads get plowed. Oh, the joys of living on the side of a mountain.

 This coat (sent to me by Andrea) was labeled as "The Official Bear Coat." Like, I don't want to be oversensitive about this, but uh, did anyone talk to the BEARS about this? Because I'm not sure this is what they want representing them as a species. Especially because this coat looks like it's saying "Who, me?"

 Photoshop: You're doing it wrong.

Either that or there's an alien species of pants models I'm unaware of.

 These are the "Apricot Splatter" tights AKA it was my first time shaving my legs.

Thanks to all of the ladies over at Babycenter who alerted me to this especially heinous jumpsuit. Floppy boobs, short legs and a crotch seam? Don't mind if I do. 

 My friend Sara sent me this lovely array of teddy bear themed workout gear. Because nothing says "I'm serious about fitness" quite like teddy bears sewn onto your shoulders. Like, I DARE someone to wear this. Please. Just do it for me?

She also sent me this dress. Look closely. It's made of rainbow keyboard keys. Luckily no one would wear it IRL.

 Except a pregnant Amber Rose. Oh honey. Honey honey honeychild. Delete that. 

S sent me this dress, which she kindly pointed out looked lie a deranged Pan-Am flight attendant. I love it when readers do my work for me.

"Um, excuse me? My eyes are UP HERE." 

(Thanks Jade!)

Who else is calling it a snow day today? It's OK if you live somewhere that doesn't even get snow. You can call it a snow day by proxy. We're friends.

Cozying Up with Tights in the Winter

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of No nonsense for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

So I woke up this morning to frigid temps. I mean like, Canada frigid. Back when I lived in Canada I remember mornings that were so cold it literally felt your bones were frozen and somehow this weather has followed me to Utah. Usually I brag that Utah has really short, mild winters, but this year we've had like four feet of snow and below zero temps. Wanna know what that means?

That I get to go shopping.

Because the clothes that I usually wear all winter are nowhere near warm enough now. I've loaded up on sweaters, a new parka, pants and then, No nonsense was kind enough to send me a few pairs of No nonsense tights and leggings to wear. Thank goodness, because I've absolutely used them anytime I've needed to wear a skirt or dress.

I got both the cable knit tights and the brown leggings and have been coming up with infinite ways to wear 'em. I love that an outfit looks  cozier and more fashion-forward with tights -- I think it's the texture that does it. I tend to dress preppy and they're perfect with boot socks and a kahki skirt for casual wear and so I don't freeze my legs off.

Check out these cute outfits!

Long sleeve sweater / H&M short jacket, $49 / Corduroy pants / Charlotte Russe slouch cowgirl boots / Bench logo bag, $41 / Necklace / Antique gold ring / Dorothy Perkins

I love tights with a knit dress. It's so cozy and like, adorable snow bunny without being too bulky.

I've been wearing mine with sportier stuff like this.

Yumi , $29 / Hollister Co. long sleeve t shirt / Old Navy skirt / Cable knit stocking / Kitten heels / Nine West cross body handbag / Leather watch / Topshop

I wore mine with boots and a stripe-y rugby shirt and it dressed down the fact that I was wearing a skirt in the middle of winter. WIN!

Anyway, No nonense has a ton of different styles and colors. Bonus? You can grab them pretty much wherever  -- grocery store, drug store, mass retailers, you name it -- and they're cheap! Such a fast, easy way to change up an outfit without buying a whole wardrobe. Not that I would do that or anything.... cough.

Check out their new line and their partnership with expert Jill Martin by liking No nonsense on Facebook and keeping in touch on Twitter. She's a style guru who did "Ambush Makeover" and author of "I Have Nothing to Wear!" Meanwhile, I'll be burying myself in a pile of blankets and blasting a space heater on my feet.

Jae Raids the Drugstore

Yes, it's that time again. That time when I expose my extreme shopping addiction to the world by detailing my latest guilty pleasures purchased from random stores nearest you. Yes, I love my department store mascara, but there's just something about a cheap lipstick that makes everything feel right with the world. Here are my favorite cheapie products from the last month or so! Click through to purchase... some I'm just using the Google shopping link so you can find the best dealzzzzz. Yes those z's were necessary.

 So Mary Kay sent me some products to try out recently. Right out the gate, I wasn't a fan of this Lash Love Mascara... I felt like it made my lashes really thin. Then, I had the bright idea to layer it over my usual Diorshow mascara. Um, amazing. It makes it look like I'm wearing falsies allll the time. So my new idea is to do a volume mascara first and a lengthening second. Brilliant!

 They also sent me this gloss, called NouriShine. I like it, especially in Red Passion. My friends and I were just talking about how wearing red lipstick is stressful because you're just worried about how it looks all night, but in a gloss? SO much easier. I'm a fan. 

 

So when winter hits, my hands go from small and childlike to decrepit and old. Thanks, dry air! After cleaning my house, they were SO bad. Equals why I shouldn't clean my house. Anyway, I headed over to Bath and Body Works and grabbed some of this Rose Salve for like, $5. It has been my savior this winter. I slather it on all of the rough spots and then....

 ... coat my hands in this stuff (Aveeno Daily Moisturizing). It's definitely taken care of the problem and people can go back to mistaking my hands for a 5 year old's again. Huzzah!

I ran out of bronzer after my last trip to Canada and I haaaate going bronzer-less. I grabbed this at like, WalMart or something and I'm in love. It's Physician's Formula
Bronzing Veil. What I love is that it holds the powder in a reserve and you use the dial to say how much you want. Takes all the guess work out. I also love that it's not like, offensively shimmery. I don't want to look like I'm heading to a beach party in January, thanks.

Along with dry winter hands comes dry winter hair, which then gets staticky and then gets stuck in my car door.  Oh the rage. Which is why I'm glad my friend introed me to Moroccan oil. Every year me and a group of friends have a "Favorite Things" party at Christmas and we all swap and this is what I brought home. SO happy I did. A teeny dab of this while blow-drying makes my hair smooth and I use it when my hair feels dry and sticky-uppy, which is totally a word. I also use it on my daughter's hair when it's all crazy. It's been a lifesaver. This is the brand I have, but you can find it just about anywhere.

I was Target shopping with my mom and I picked up this e.l.f. Beauty Book. I say "Target shopping" because it's not like regular shopping. I believe you make poor financial choices in Target. I don't know why. But this was like, $5 and it has served me well. Especially over the holidays, when I was doing more dramatic eyes. I love love the bronze-y shades. 

That's it for this month -- have any beauty finds you wanna share with me?

What I Wore: Remix w/ Liverpool Jeans!

 I am aware that I've already worn this blazer and these boots in other posts. But I can't be original ALL THE TIME people. Sometimes I repeat. Especially right before Christmas, when these pictures were taken. It was one of those days where I had to shop, cook and attend a party all in one day. Blazers are definitely my go-to for busy days like that because I can throw them on over what is clearly just a polo and look polished.

Also, Liverpool Jeans were kind enough to send me a couple of pairs of their awesome-fitting jeans. I heart these! I can't say enough about the fit. And! They said they'd give a pair to a lucky reader, so there will be a giveaway next week. I have another outfit to show you with the other pair of dee-vine skinnies they sent me. The coolest part? The jeans have Beatles lyrics printed on the inside! These ones have "Let It Be," which happens to be my favorite Beatles song. Stay tuned for next week's giveaway!

 

 Blazer: Bluenotes (Canada)
Polo: Tommy Hilfiger
Jeans: c/o Liverpool Jeans

Boots: Soda

I was going for like, a preppy outdoorsman vibe here. Nailed it! Brown jeans and a blazer -- who knew?

 OK, so here's my question: What pieces do you find yourself reaching for again and again?

Freaky Friday

I had the worrrrst night last night. A neighborhood dog barked for literally four hours straight and I could not sleep. I should note that I'm a dog person and I love them, but not when they continually bark and ruin my night. I ended up out on the couch with my noise canceling headphones on at 4am. It was awesome. So I'm feeling a little off today. I apologize if I'm not as snarky as usual. My snark needs 8 hours of sleep to be really effective.

Heather sent me this very expensive Dolce and Gabbana bag that basically looks like the gross blanket that your grandma always keeps on the back of her sofa and that always smells like Cheetos.

 I can't decide what this looks like more. Carpet, or Harry's van from Dumb and Dumber. Either way, I don't want it near my crotch. 

 What? Owls are hot right now, right?

PS Owls are one thing that I do not get whatsoever. Like, I can see how they're cute, but I wouldn't want one in my house. For one, I'm scared of birds. For two, is it me or do owls seem kind of judgey? Like, you don't know my life owl!

 Alison sent me a huge collection of really sad fashion. And I chose this, because nothing is quite as sad as acid wash fringe. 

 Well that's subtle and ladylike.

PS Shoemaker, I can see that you just put a glove on a shoe and I think that's lazy.

 K first of all, I thought this was Gwyneth Paltrow and automatically hated it because I really, really dislike anyone who exercises four hours a day and eats baby food while recommending you buy a $4,000 snood. But when I realized that it wasn't GP, I decided that regardless, I hate Barbie tracksuits. Like, I didn't know they existed until 5 minutes ago, but I already know I hate them. 

 This is the ugliest ring ever, but it might stop me from biting my nails. 

 My youngest brother sent me this hoodie. 

I thought it would be good for those of you whose husbands have gained a little weight over the years. Zip it up and suddenly it's your college boyfriend! 

Of course, he'll have to keep it on always, which could get awkward. 

Lauren sent me this headband. I think it would be cool to buy this and wear it to like, parent-teacher conferences and act completely natural. Like "Oh this old thing?"

This purse disturbs me deeply. Wanna know why?

Because one night, I had the brilliant idea to watch Pan's Labyrinth on my own.

Cue sobbing in the fetal position. 

Nooooooooooooo oooooooo oo

And with that being said, I think I'm going to curl up in the fetal position, but because I'm tired and only slightly terrified that I actually had to Google a picture of the scariest thing of all time.

Happy Friday naps to everyone!