Freaky Friday: Bad Boots

There are so many cute boots out there, and then there are bad, bad boots, which should return to the deepest depths of the fiery lake of Satan and never return.

Am I being dramatic? You be the judge.



"WHAT HAVE YOU DON TO POCAHANTAS!?" The worst part? Someone gave these a five star review. Really? What were your criteria? Fringiness and stereotype?



Why these are still on the market, I'll never know. They look like the blow up shoes that I made my dog wear when I dressed her up as Jack Sparrow for Halloween. DON'T JUDGE ME! I just like dogs in clothes!


The shoe boot? This pair is having an identity crisis.


These boots make me feel all sorts of dirty and wrong. Like, I know they're just legs, but doesn't it make you feel like a dirty peeping Tom?



K, so explain this one to me. WHY wear boots if the toe is open? Doesn't that negate the entire purpose of wearing boots. Not to mention, are you the Jolly Green Giant's wife? What's with the color??



Hahaha. Gameboy shoes! Hey, I love my Nintendo DS as much as the next closet nerd, but I don't understand how you can play it if it's on your foot. Also, it makes you look like you're going to do a quickdraw Super Mario Brothers shootout.


So shiny... and confusing... The worst is these are from of one of my favorite stores, which saddens me. Why do they want customers to dress like a disco ball? And KNEE HIGH? K, I can't even look at them. There are so many things wrong.



OH! What have we here??? The "Lady" who is "Gaga" for CRAPTASTIC FASHION? I'm not going to name names, but omg why does she torment me so?

PS: PUT SOME PANTS ON. I AM TIRED OF LOOKING AT YOUR SCARY 80s FITNESS VIDEO CROTCH.