2013 Holiday Gift Guide: For Kids

Are you guys ready? I'm gonna drop some knowledge on you right now.

What if I told you that it doesn't matter what other people buy/get/do/don't do for their kids at Christmastime?

Yesterday, after seeing my 6th article on why a mom does/doesn't do Elf on the Shelf for her kids, I posted on my Facebook page that the Republicans and Dems could learn a thing or two about debate from these women. Seriously, it has been bananas.


One mom says she doesn't do it because it takes the spirit away from the holidays.

The other says she does it to make magical memories for her children.

One debates that it's lying to her kids.

The other says her children are only little for so long,

One legitimately said the elf is satanic.

Yeah, can we go ahead and just stop right there?

Why is it that at Christmas time, moms get so smug? Instead of you know, actually enjoying the holiday, we feel the need to constantly defend the "whys" of our choices and why they're superior to any other.

Look, parenting is hard at the best of times. So I get that parenting is even harder at Christmastime. You want your children to enjoy it, without completely spoiling them and exhausting yourself in the process. So when you see Instagram posts of your favorite pretend  elf causing mischief at someone else's house, you have a reaction to it. You say you're too tired to keep that up for a month, or you Pinterest new ideas to step up your game.

In the end, I think the best magical gift for your children would be to get off Facebook and stop debating with people you don't know/like. Getting heated about what someone else is doing for their kids at Christmas has no purpose. Comparing festivities, parties, present amounts and yes, even a family tradition like Elf on the Shelf robs you of the spirit of the season, regardless of what side you're on.

I don't care if you overindulge your kids, if things are tight this year, if you go all out or you're a Christmas minimalist. You don't have to justify your reasons to anyone. It's OK if someone chooses something else for their kids. It doesn't affect you at all.

Breathe.

So, I guess my "Gift Guide" for kids is this: Give them what you can. If that means creating elaborate elf scenarios, so be it. If that means taking your kids to see the town nativity, go for it and good on you. If you're more of a cardboard chocolate advent calendar person, cheers -- that's what I grew up on. If you love giving a boatload of presents, be my guest -- just don't go into debt over it.


But remember that what you can give your kids is different than what others can give their own brood. Let's lay off the smug, slap on a smile, and stop justifying ourselves all season long. Let's focus on what's important, which probably isn't being "right" on the Internet. Let's remember that it's actually really truly OK to disagree.

Love,

An elf-owning, but constantly-forgetting, tired, movie-crying, present-shopping, premade cookie dough-baking, lights-loving, religious-undertone creating, sometimes uptight, but usually nice Mom.

PS: Please do not comment on this post about why or why you don't do Elf on the Shelf.

I don't care.

2013 Holiday Gift Guide: For Him

How was everyone's holiday? I am kind of exhausted after it all. I did Black Friday shopping and Saturday shopping, so I feel like my legs and feet are calling "Uncle!" today. But luckily it was trauma-free. My friend and I didn't go out until Friday morning and I think all the crazy rioters were home in bed by then, so it was low key. I still got everything I needed and I'm feeling very accomplished. Yes, that's all it takes.

So, I thought that this week, I'd forgo my usual posting schedule for some gift ideas. I LOVE giving gifts. Gifts are totally my love language. It's because I'm so awkward emotionally and am terrible at verbal and physical love. But can I buy you a present? Oh yes I can!

I take great pride in my gift-giving abilities. And first up: The main man in my life. Buying for my husband is a pain because he's a very even keel person. He doesn't ever get too mad or too sad or too happy -- he's always in the middle. So it's taken years for me to know what he really likes, because when I ask him what he wants, he'll say nothing. THIS IS ANNOYING.

Now, I put a plan in place and basically operate within the same realm each year. It makes it less stressful because I already know what types of things to buy, I just switch up the actual items. Here are my five must-haves for hubby shopping and what I spend on each.

1. A Higher-End Functional Piece: Budget around $100

My husband does like the finer things in life, but he'll never buy them on his own. I use Christmas as a way to buy a nice functional piece to which he can't say no and that will last him a really, really long time. I've done jackets, boots, nice sunglasses, a watch, pricey cologne (that I like obviously) etc.

Old Navy Mens Wool Blend Pea Coats - Black jack / Buckle Black Bias Coat / Ezekiel Westside Coat / Mixed Media Parka Big and Tall 878323803 | Wool Blend | Coats | Men |... / Boohoo Cord Trim Button Placket Parka

Guess watch / Fox The Moter Sunglasses / Gucci Pour Homme II

2. A (Couple of) Fun, Trendy Pieces: Budget around $50 for both

My hubs works in a pretty casual office, so he rarely needs really professional clothes. He usually heads to work in dark jeans, a button up and a cargo jacket. So I like to buy a couple of trendier shirts that he can wear to work but doesn't feel like a total dork wearing out as well. He's picky, so I don't push too hard for something new. Instead, I look for interesting details, like a shirt with grommets or a super subtle pattern. I'm also mindful of his favorite brands -- that way, I know the right size and that it's something he'll like.

Banana Republic Vintage Utility Shirt - Construction grey / FOX Blaise Mens Thermal / AE Plaid Button Down Shirt / River Island Blue colour block polo shirt, $29 / Fox Primer T-Shirt

3. Something Fun: Budget around $30 to $50

My husband doesn't play a lot of video games -- we have a PS3 but it's really a glorified DVD player. Still, when I'm in Canada, he likes to play, so I usually get him a new game, CD or something else that's fun and just for him -- no "we" gifts. But Wii gifts would be fine. But seriously, I like to look for some type of gadget, game or movie that says "Hey I know we have completely different tastes in everything but I will put up with watching Skyfall multiple times because I love you."

4. Something Practical: Budget around $50 to $100

Let's face it: Guys sometimes suck at buying stuff that they need. I don't know about yours, but my husband will make do with something just to avoid going to the store. So I make sure one of my gifts is something that he really needs, but probably wouldn't buy himself, like some new speakers for his car or an iPhone dock for his office. Just something that enhances his life but that he may not have considered.

The Sharper Image tech accessory / Grandoe Crazy Horse Ii Leather Gloves / The Art of Shaving / Sol Republic 1241-04 Tracks HD On-Ear Interchangeable Headphones with...

5. Something Thoughtful: No budget -- usually these are the least expensive.

While I might be an emotional robot, I do like to include something thoughtful. This is usually something family-related that only my husband and I would really "get." One year, I ordered a custom keychain that was stamped with all the important dates in our family -- both of our birthdays, wedding date and then our kids' birthdays. He loves it. I've also done family pictures, think-y books for my scholarly huz, mementos that I picked up on vacation and an entire scrapbook I made myself in an uncharacteristic bout of creativity during our poor newlywed phase. He keeps all of this stuff forever and it makes Christmas morning that much better.

While these are the 5 categories I try to hit, I usually buy other stuff as I come across it. He does wear a suit once a week for church, so ties and church shoes are necessities, even if they aren't "wow" gifts.

I think, in the end, your husband/boyfriend/life partner just wants to know that you were thinking about him. So whether you like to dress him up or geek him out, if you put a little thought into it, he'll get it.

What do you buy your husband for Christmas? I'm always up for new ideas.

Check back tomorrow for another gift guide!

What I Wore: Jumping the Gun

Yup, I did it. I jumped the gun. My house is officially Christmas-ized. And I will never get the glitter out of my hair. I've taken like, three showers and I keep finding it in there. Ah well, I'm happy to get it done and that I can focus on the rest of the holidays. I'm super excited for Thanksgiving and not just because of Black Friday. While I already had Canadian Thanksgiving, I still love making my mama's recipes for family down here.

And yes, she wanted to know why I made fun of her on the blog.

And my dad didn't care and asked how to use Microsoft Word.

Anyway, these outfit pics were clearly taken before Christmas barfed on my house. I looove wearing my leather pants with a mid-length boot. It makes them so much less "10 Things I Hate About You" Club Skunk and easier for day-wear. Not that I minded Heath Ledger in leather pants, but that's beside the point.

Pants: H&M (similar and cheap!) (love the shape)

Tank: F21 (love this) (super flattering) (this with a cardi!)

Cardigan: I have no idea I bought it in Canada
Boots: Payless (similar) (similar)

Bracelet stack: Gift from brother, Marc Jacobs, local boutique. It's just a literal stack of bracelets.

It's dawning on me that I'll have my kids home for almost a whole week. What am I going to do with them!? We already bought tickets for Frozen on Thursday night -- we always see a movie after Thanksgiving dinner and it's one of my fave traditions ever. Because I hate football and just want to be in a dark place to digest my turkey.

So am I the only one who decorated this weekend? 

Freaky Friday

So the other day my dad sent me an email with a funny picture. Then, while FaceTiming with my mom, he came in the room and asked if I had seen it. My mom was like "Where did you find that picture, Ricky?" (Yes, my dad's name is Ricky. Not Rick or Richard. Ricky. It's the best.) He was like "Pinterest!" My mom was like "Uh, since when do you use Pinterest?" And he just quietly shuffled out of the room.

Now, you must understand that my parents are the two most unintentionally hilarious people ever. My mom is like hyper-confrontational and opinionated and my dad is a sweet Mr. Magoo type and together, they are awesome and provide endless hours of entertainment for me and my brothers. Observe this exchange which occurred when  watching "Date Night" with my parents, brothers and kids and the strip club scene started.

My Dad: OK, kids, you need to go play somewhere else.
My daughter: Why, Poppy? (I die with cuteness overload because my kids call my dad Poppy)
My Dad: Because this is an adult film.
Me: Um, can we call it a "grownup movie" because I really don't want her telling people we let her watch an adult film.
My Mom: Yeah! Double-XL!!
Me: That's a clothing size. You mean XXX.
My brother: WHY ARE YOU SO OLD?

And yes, Double-XL has in fact made it into the family vocabulary for anything racy.

Anyway, as an ode to my Pinterest-loving dad, I got sucked into the archives over at everyone's favorite everyone-is-better-than-me showcase to find some bad fashion. Let's all say thanks to Ricky for providing this opportunity.

By the way, this is the picture he sent me:

 He's a biker. So naturally when he saw my favorite thing and his favorite thing together, he knew it was a win.

And yes I want one. Can you imagine grocery shopping with that bad boy?

 This is an ostrich feather veil. They use it as torture devices for people whose hands are covered in paint and can't scratch their noses.

 For when you don't have time to touch up your pedicure before you wear heels at the pool like a shmuck.

How to: Tell your mom you're sick of being in charge of bringing rolls to Thanksgiving dinner in a passive aggressive manner. 

 This is how I reacted to these shoes.

An entire statement necklace made from 6-inch geodes? Really? I just...

 In high school I had a pair of clogs (shut up) and when I wore them to class, one of my male friends was like "Well, well, well, look at those clodhoppers" and I never wore them again. But partly because my dog ate them. REGARDLESS, I hear his voice in my head in relation to these shoes.

 Remember when Ann Taylor got busted for grotesquely Photoshopping their models so they looked like weird, skinny aliens? OK, they do that daily. Here, here and here, if you're interested. Just wear this dress and you can skip the Photoshop and look like a skinny linebacker instead.

These would be a nightmare for my creepy little baby hands. And by nightmare I mean full glove.


Alright, thanks to my Dad for inspiring FF today. He's the coolest.

Also, I didn't put up Christmas last week, but it's happening tomorrow. I just bought a new wreath and I like, can't even function right now because I know that I'll be listening to Michael Buble come morning time.

The 10 Commandments of Scarves

So my cute cousin Sarah was asking me about scarves the other day and I realized that I had done a 10 Commandments of Belting but that I had left scarves out in the cold. And, since they're totally my favorite way to accessorize, they deserve a little love. So, beginners unite! Let's talk scarves.

1) Thou shalt tie thy scarf in different ways. For whilst a basic tie is nice, thou shalt be more adventurous. Thou shalt also watch this video for ideas.



2) Thou shalt contrast thy number of layers to the size of thy scarf. If thou art wearing lots of layers, thou shalt wear a simpler scarf -- otherwise, thou might lookest like a hipster. If thy outfit is simple, thou can wear a larger scarf.

 

3) Thou shall tuck the ends of thy scarf if thou is wearing a neck with a deep V. It lookest like an ascot and is delightful unto me.



4) Thou shalt belt a voluminous scarf, lest thou be mistaken as with child.

Lulu Floral Pattern Scarf (Juniors)

5) Thou shalt make a boring outfit exciting by using a patterned scarf. I wouldst say "Jazz up" but thou knowest I hate the term. Still, thou shall not be afraid of prints.



6) Thou shalt never drape thy scarf over thy shoulders, for thou art not an eccentric old artist lady.

Tildon Polka Dot Infinity Scarf

7) Thou shalt stop being confused about how to wear a scarf when thou shall buy an infinity scarf. Lo, it is one continuous loop and thou needest only slip it over your head. Thou can do that.

Nordstrom Wool Scarf

8) Thou shalt wear thick scarves during the winter and thin scarves during the summer. Thou shalt look for wool-based scarves right now, because winter shall arrive soon.

9) Thou shalt layer necklaces over scarves, if thou art adventurous.

10) Thou shalt never overthink scarves. Scarves shall be fun accessories and should not be intimidating. If thou art intimidated by an article of clothing, thou shalt be checked by thy doctor for social anxiety.

Thou may also ask scarf-related questions in the comments section.

What I Wore: Toned Down

How was everyone's weekend? We ended up having to reschedule family pictures because of the weather and I held off putting up the Christmas tree -- but I'm definitely doing it this coming Saturday. We decided to have one last "do nothing" weekend before the holidays kick in, so we went out to eat, saw "Ender's Game" (we were supposed to see "Thor" but there were no good seats left and I was happy because I wanted to see EG anyway) and hung out around the house and actually cooked a couple of meals. Lovely. But now I'm ready to get my Christmas season on, so watch out.

Oh, I also wore this. This dress is A LOT (read: Jessica Rabbit-esque) on its own, so I had to tone it down a little. Blazers are my favorite way to make a cocktail dress less... cocktail-y?

Dress: Dorothy Perkins (here and it's on sale!) (not petite) (their dresses... I die) (and cheap!)

Blazer: F21 (perfect shape) (pretty for holidays!) (cheap!)

Tights: I think I bought them in Canada last year? (similar) (plus size)

Shoes: Guess (similar) (pricey but pretty!)
Bracelet: c/o Wizards of the West
Earrings: F21

Red animal print just makes me happy. And sorry I've been wearing these shoes so much, but they have a gold heel and are the perfect shape, so I can't stop myself. And I LOVE pairing patterned tights with patterned dresses. Gives the outfit depth without being like, woah. 

I'm glad I have readers who totally understand what "like, woah" means.

Anyway, a solid cocktail dress and a blazer and closet must-haves as far as I'm concerned. Super versatile too -- You could throw a sweater over the dress and use it as a skirt and blazers literally go with everything and make you look like a boss. 

...a toned-down boss. 

Freaky Friday

 It's cold and rainy today, which means snow is probably on its way to the mountain. On the bright side, it's not like we had family pictures scheduled for tomorrow or anything OH WAIT YES WE DID.

I just bought a new blanket sweater and so I've got my foot heater on, I'm bundled up and we made cinnamon rolls for breakfast. I'm kiiiind of tempted to put up my Christmas decorations tomorrow. Is it too early? Tell me honestly.

I guess I'll distract myself with ugly clothes for now.

 Robin sent along this gem. Is there any time when a garment the zips over the entirety of your face is necessary? I mean other than being a creepy floral axe murderer, of course.

 BOOBS GO HERE.

 Meleah sent over these pants, which were like $430. I think they might be priced per inch of crotch-drop.

 She also sent these ones, which honestly just look unsanitary in a "I just dragged my pants all over a mall bathroom" kind of way.

 This looks like a superhero sweater. And your superhero name is Breastplate Rose.

 And here's your cape.

Made from Snuffleupagus hide.

 This might be the ugliest jacket I've ever had on the site. And that's saying something, because they are everywhere. Are the pockets giving me a snide smile? I DON'T KNOW.

Sherpas. So hot right now.

 Also, this.

My husband and I were laughing at this last night. Really, Mariah Carey? Working for millions of dollars for like, three months was literally like going to work every day in HELL with SATAN?

Maybe we're being just a little dramatic? Someone put that girl in the mines.

Alright, I'm off for the weekend. And maybe putting up Christmas decorations What who said that?