Product Review!: e.l.f. Studio Cream Eyeliner

***Disclaimer: I was not reimbursed for this review. While I think it would be super cool if e.l.f. sent me free stuff all the time, I bought my product on my own and this is all pure honesty. That's how I roll.***

So it's no secret that I'm obsessed with e.l.f. products. Seriously, half the items in my makeup bag are from the brand. It's just that every time I order with them I usually have to meet a certain dollar amount for free stuff, which means I order like, 9 billion products because everything is so dang cheap. You'd think that at a $1 to $3 you'd be getting like, Bonne Bell Lip Smackers and nail files, but all the stuff is awesome.

The last order I did I noticed they had a new cream eyeliner. Have I also told you I'm obsessed with eyeliner? I've been using e.l.f. liquid liner pens forever and had an extra $3 to spare, so I added it to my cart.

Ooooh I am so glad that I did. This stuff is awesome. Now, it's not for the demurely makeuped. If you prefer a super natural (but not supernatural, that's completely different) look, you should know that this makes a very thick line. But if you like a little drama, like me, it's PERFECT.

I bought the plummy purple color because I have blue eyes. As a quick makeup note, if you want your eyes to stand out, wear an eye color that is opposite. Nothing bugs me more than seeing blue eyeshadow on a chick with blue eyes. (OK, fine. Social discrimination bugs me more. But blue eyeshadow is UP THERE.) If you want a quick refresher for eyeliner rules depending on eye color:

Blue eyes: Brown or plum
Green eyes: Brown or red/pink
Brown eyes: Navy blue
Hazel: Brown
All colors: Gray
No one ever: White

Anyway, this cream eyeliner stuff is pretty awesome. I use it to do a heavier cat eye on top when I'm going sans-liner on the bottom. I've also used it to add a little color and definition along the bottom lashes too and I was totally happy with the results. It comes with an adorable little brush that I lose on a near-daily basis, but it's perfect for lining. And I feel like if you have trouble with liquid liner but still want the drama, cream liner is the next best thing. You have way more control over the product so you're not getting liquid liner all over the place. And as a completely unnecessary note, the other day I had one of those massive liquid eyeliner malfunctions where I got it EVERYWHERE and looked like I was in a fight and had to wash my face completely and start over. It was a great day.

Also, this stuff lasts forever. It will not smudge because it dries and then it's on there until you do the scary thing at night when you go from hot mama to pajama-ridden, ponytailed sleep machine.

Anyway, totally worth a try if you have $3 lying around and you want to try something new. And I know you do! It's basically the price of a massive Cherry Limeade from Sonic. I totally stopped and got one at like 10:30 last night. I'm staring at the cup right now. My life is riveting.

EDIT!!


Alright, as per request, here's some pictures of the liner IN ACTION! So, I love me some cat eye, but since it's heavy on top I typically leave the bottom alone to avoid closing in the eye. It's super dramatic and retro and a lot easier to do with cream than it is liner.


Herrrrre's the whole effect. And now you know what my hair looks like in the morning. IGNORE THAT. Focus on the eyes. I've also got a layer of mascara on because I die without mascara. Seriously.

Hopefully that makes more sense! I always hesitate when posting pics of myself on the blog because I don't want everyone to be like OMG JAE STOP BEING SO VAIN. But if you need them, ask away and I shall feel validated.

The Shopping Diet

It's no secret that I love to shop. Obviously. And for some reason, it's always on a Friday. I just love the festivity of doing something fun and indulgent on Fridays to signify the end of another week. So that usually leads to my buying things for myself and OCCASIONALLY for my children.

But the month of May is a different story. Every May, I put myself on a shopping diet because I know Memorial Day is coming up. And Memorial Day is like Black Friday except for clothes instead electronics. Plus there's less overall trampling. Since I know that I'll probably go over my monthly shopping budget in one day, I stop buying things completely. For people who hate to shop, it's like "So what?" But for me, it's KILLER.

Yesterday I was getting dressed and I was so annoyed at everything in my closet. I was bugged that I didn't have anything new in rotation and had to make do with what I had. Which I KNOW is ridiculous because if you've ever seen my closet, you know that a lack of clothing is not my problem. And there are bigger problems in the world. At dinner time, if my kids won't eat, me and my husband lecture them that they have starving uncles in Africa. Because my brother legitimately lives in Botswana and is on a gluten-free diet. That is practically starving, in my opinion. I heart gluten.

So, to take up time until Saturday, I'm making a shopping list of the summer things I want to find while I'm out and about and grubbing for deals. It's the equivalent to going to the bakery while on a sugar detox. Basically I stop eating before Thanksgiving so I can binge on candied yams and pie. I don't know why I do this to myself.

On my shopping list:

Super bright summer accessories. I want to wear an arm of these with a plain white tee and walking shorts so it looks like I made an effort. (Cocobelle via Athleta)


Yellow wedges! I MUST FIND SOME. My cute sister in law came over wearing some adorbs yellow wedges and I had some major shoe envy going on. I want some of my own to wear with my white a-line skirt or khaki shorts. Plus, they'll look so cute with a tan. (Nine West)

White casual shoes. I've been wearing this pair of beat-up moccasins for like, four years and they are getting pretty grungy. It's just that I really only wear white shoes through the summer and I never think of getting a new pair when I go to get my mocs out of the closet and realize they smell and need to be glue-gunned together. (Target.)


Pretty summer dresses that I can wear with my cowboy boots all season. I love wearing dresses with scuffy, dirty boots. It's such a classic juxtaposition. Also, my country-boy husband wants to go to the Tim McGraw concert and far be it from me to be underdressed near Tim. (Jigsaw)



A preppy white or cream bag. I love to dress prep and my black bag is starting to look a little heavy for the warm weather. I'm looking for one with tons of detail. Love the two tone of this one EVEN THOUGH it is by Jessica Simpson. The girl cannot give up her Daisy Dukes and I cannot resist her shoes and bags. It's shameful on both of our parts.

I also need to get a swimsuit. I have been busting my butt at the gym lately so I don't feel the need to avert my eyes while trying them on. But I have no idea what I want. Maybe a vintage-y maillot? I shall return and report.

Is anyone else going to be on the prowl this weekend? Am I missing anything on my list?

Upping the Ante for Spring Shopping

Now is about the time every year that I get stuck in a rut, fashion-wise. Something about the doom and gloom weather and the craziness of my kids makes me want to hide in my room wearing my husband's sweatpants and that free shirt I got from work. This is when I have to work the hardest to put myself together and get going! Since I have a strict "no staying at home all day rule" it means I usually have to, at the very least, put on pants. So it's time to try a few new things.

I have to admit, I get annoyed when I hear someone say, "I couldn't pull that off," after viewing a style or trend. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I contest that there's always some element of style that you can incorporate into your current wardrobe so that it looks up to day without you looking like a trend whore.

By taking your cues from a handful of trends, it's a good way to add new pieces to your wardrobe without spending a ton of cash while making things look new and different. Observe:

Something girly:

(Charlotte Russe)

Girly pieces look best when paired with decidedly ungirly clothes. I would pair these with my favorite gray pencil skirt and a structured shirt and cardigan a la Mad Men. If you pair with girly things, it's a tad too sweet... like a Fun Dip. Mmmm Fun Dips. But Fun Dips always give me canker sores. What I'm saying here is that too much girliness is not a good thing. Look for pale, ballerina-esque colors and ruffles. When I went on a search for ruffled things there was WAY too many I wanted to buy. My husband will not be impressed.

Something sexy:


(Alloy)
It hurts my heart when a woman doesn't own anything that helps her to feel smokin' hot. The problem is that sexy is usually perceived to be skin tight and that is no bueno when you're battling post-baby bulge and that Chocolate Cream Pie Shake you had yesterday (Which I learned has 700 calories AFTER I consumed one in like, 3 seconds. Kill me.) Instead, look for form-fitting, with details that make you feel more comfortable. Ruching around the waist? Check. Bouse-y sleeves that hide heavier arms? Check. Deep v-neck so your hubby's eyes pop out of his head like he's a cartoon character (A-wooo-ga!)? Check and check. Can you imagine this with a pair of bootcut jeans and heels? Simple but hot.

Something biker or rocker inspired:


(Delias)
My love for a good biker jacket is well documented. I have five. I just think they make bodies look insane with the seaming and the higher neck. Awesome. Buy one. If you already have a biker jacket, look for other biker/rocker wear to add to girlier pieces. Studded shoes, a leather bracelet, whatever. I like that rock-inspired pieces add immediate texture to whatever I'm wearing. Jeans and boots are just meh, but then I add a corded necklace and everything is tied together.

Something fancy:


(F21)
I love things that look substantial and expensive without costing a ton. This little baby is $5 and I WILL HAVE IT. You should have something equally ornate and expensive in your wardrobe or jewelry box. It's awesome to dress up an otherwise plain outfit. I have a brown wrap dress that I adore but is hard to accessorize. This would be perfect because it lends a pop of color and all I'd need is a pair of stud earrings to finish things off. Plus, aqua blue is awesome on everyone.

Something bright:


(Delias)
It's spring, people! Time to shuck the gray, brown and black for something that doesn't make you feel like a sad emo kid. A super bright piece can anchor a whole outfit. Even if you're wearing the same slacks and flats you always do, add something bright near your face and you're guaranteed compliments. I love the idea of this belted with a brown leather belt too, so it's not so shapeless. Either way, it's a adorable, hence your adorableness while wearing it.

K, so do you have your lists ready. I'm going to have Tim Gunn moment and tell you to make it work. The next time you see a celeb wearing a trend you'd love to try, find a way to do it on a small scale and I promise you'll be able to "pull it off." By updating a few key pieces in your wardrobe you automatically update just about everything else. Super easy and affordable. I wish I could take everyone shopping!

Unless you were excited about Gaga dressing in an egg. With an oxygen tank. That is neither safe nor attractive. I would have been more impressed if someone literally gave birth to her on stage.

Oh no... I'm giving her ideas.

PSW: Where to Shop

I know it sucks when you go to the mall and all of the stores are geared toward size 0's, but it is totally THEIR LOSS. I was just reading about British department store Debenham's (which I've used on the site before) using size 14 mannequins and the marketing director saying that it was because most of their shoppers were (duh) a size 14. Aaaaaand how long did it take them to figure it out?

Luckily, you can find clothing stores that are non frumpy AND have clothes that will fit. And more and more of them are rolling out every day. Here is a comprehensive list of plus-size stores, what you'll find there and what you should buy (OMG I love telling people what to buy.) Note that not all of these are plus-size specific stores, some just have extensive plus size product lists. WOO!

PlusSizeFix.com



Unfortunately, PSF is only an online store, but I love it for "all of my friends are going out and I don't want to be the frumpy one" clothes. Mostly trendy stuff, it goes to 3XL and the whole site is filled with cute stuff like this beaded shirt here. Pair with some trouser jeans and a pointy toe and you have girl's night out DOWN.

Lane Bryant


LB has been working hard to change it's image lately, and I really love the new stuff. This pencil skirt is amazing, and their stuff fits well. They are also completely dedicated to helping you find something you like, which means going to the actual store will be a good experience. Best for well fitting, staple pieces that you'll wear again and again.

Faith21 by Forever21

K, it's no secret I love me some Forever 21 accessories, but I love their new plus size line, Faith21 too. Best for trendy pieces, check online first to see what you like. If you want to go in-store, call ahead; some stores don't have Faith21 yet. The larger ones will though. They do a lot of horizontal stripes, so beware. But I LOVE this feather shirt (I have a peacock obsession)

Ann Taylor, Ann Taylor Loft

In sizes up to 18, AT and ATL can cater to the plus size crowd as well. While some of the pieces can be pricey, they are awesome for basics like jeans, dresses and skirts that you want to invest some coin into. I much prefer ATL over AT, but whatever floats your boat!

Torrid

Best for younger moms who aren't ready to dress like they are 35 *just yet*, I love Torrid for younger, less apologetic pieces. Sometimes I find that plus size clothing can be all about hiding or trying to blend in, which is why I love Torrid for being all "whatever" and trying bright, flashy, sexy clothing. II love their line of tights and they always have awesome pencil skirts.

Avenue

Avenue is awesome for a more polished look that is hyper flattering. These people know how to dress plus size figures. How awesome is this dress/sweater/belt combo? I love. And all of their stuff is just plain PRETTY. For sure one of my faves, and great for those PEOPLE I KNOW who are always scared of looking too young in clothes.

Some other places to try?

Old Navy: Old Navy has a plus size line that goes up to 30 and allows you to get great, one season basics.


While Old Navy clothes aren't made to stand the test of time, per say, you can get lots of cheap stuff to last you through the summer so you can update your wardrobe without breaking the bank.

Maurice's: Their stores are awesome and it is literally impossible not to find something you like there. They have a plus size section that goes up to 3XL OR 24 and their maxi dresses and business wear stuff is awesome.


(Also, they have really, really good sales. I bought a kimono sweater from there for like $6 BOOM!)

Alright, I think that should do it. There should be no excuse for not finding a place to shop. Remember that most department stores, like Macy's, will also have plus size sections. Whether you head to a specialty store or just a store that offers your size, there are plenty of trends and clothes to try.

Go forth and shop!

If I Had Thirty Dollars...

So the other day a cheque (check for you born and bred Yankees) for $30 arrived in the mail for me unexpectedly. Since the $30 wasn't going to make much difference to my bank account either way, I resolved to spend it on something pretty for myself. (Moi? Shopping for moi? Unheard of.)

There are likely some naysayers who scoff at my $30. "$30!?" They say. "Shame on you. You should only buy expensive designer pieces, or none at all!" Well, I say that is crazy talk. There is a lot of good style that can be bought for a paltry $30. And since I feel like I've been doing a lot of Freaky Friday posts as of late, I am far too chipper about my $30 to rain on anyone's fashion parade. Instead I give you some awesome buys for $30 and below.




I think I've sung my song of love for trouser jeans before, have I not. I got a pair at the Gap for a measly $6 and I LOOOVE them. LOVE. And you wear them and people are like "ooh, what's the occasion?" and you're like "Um, I like wearing pants?" Anyway, I couldn't find mine from Gap BUT I did find these for $20 at Alloy.com.


Ooh, I love a good multiple strand necklace. Yes, they get tangled and then you have to have your sister in law detangle them while you frantically get ready to go out (This may have happened to me once) but they're so pretty! This one from PacSun WILL be mine - $6.


I love a pretty ring. I love a huge ring. A huge, pretty ring? Double love for a mere $16 from American Eagle.

Clutches complete my life. I am looking for a pretty frilly one. The ones that I have are usually pretty structured, but now that spring is coming it's time for some girly goodness. This one is by Steve Madden for $30. Love the non-girly color too.

Ahh! I've been looking for a double strand belt. Yet another in my "things I can wear with my Fryes" arsenal. Asos for $30.


Aw, how pretty is this headband? And how easy would it be to wear it and feel pretty? The answer: very easy. Ans since it's only $7 from Dorothy Perkins, I would have $23 left to spend on myself. Oh, spending money on myself is ever so much fun.



Ah, this sweater conjures up notions of sitting on my chaise lounge and writing in my journal with a feather pen. Since I don't own a chaise lounge, a journal or a feather pen, I'll have to be content with wearing it while shopping. Old Navy, $27


K, so number one gripe with LIFE in general: people who wear vintage tees without really caring about what's on them. Fortunately, I am a big Beatles fan and love me some Strawberry Fields Forever. I also imagine, while I am having American Idol tryout competitions in my car, that I would sing Let it Be for Beatles night. YES I DO THINK ABOUT THIS SERIOUSLY. Anyway, you too can have a piece of my Idol dream with a graphic tee like this... Delias for $15.


Cutest shoes of life. I love the rhinestones on the bow. It makes them not so bo peep sweet. Forever 21,
$23

Such a pretty statement cuff for only $30. I love pearls. My next big jewelry purchase will be a pearl ring, I'm sure of it. I think they are so pretty and classic and they go with everything. I'd wear this cuff with a black tee and jeans and call it good.

Okay, so, as I'm off to hit the mall with my twenty and a ten, if you're feeling up to it, sneak a couple of bills out of your husband's wallet, blame it on his sketchy coworker and go see what you can find on the cheap. Wear it, feel good about it, and return and report.

Your Best Bets: At the Mall

So, I was at the mall the other day for *ahem* research purposes (SEE WHAT I DO FOR YOU?) and was thinking about people who don't like to shop. For those people, the mall is a scary place. There are a lot of different stores, with scary salespeople that make you feel like you shouldn't be there. Add in a couple kids to the mix, and you are way out of your element. However, I can attest to the fact that if you get i nand get out, your children will be exponentially happier when all is said and done. Of course, a promise for a trip to the play area doesn't hurt either.

If you want to run to the mall for somethings, hit tried and true stores where you know you can get you want for a decent price. Here are your Best Bets!



Express - Best For: Date Night and Dress Up Gear

I know I've expounded on my love for Express before. I just really do love it. If I am looking for something to dress up a pair of dark jeans or have something coming up that I want to look super hot for, that's my first stop. You can find awesome shirts for not much cash, and they know how to work a sequin. Their clothes also fit really well, meaning that you have more confidence when stepping out.



Aeropostale- Best For: Everyday Wear

K, I will admit. Aeropostale is mainly a store for high schoolers. HOWEVER, it is the perfect place to get everyday shirts. I'm not talking about the actual graphic tees with the brand name splashed over it, I'm talking about the cute little knit, empire waisted shirts that you can find up on the walls. I have said time and time again, you don't have to dress like you're going to a concert every day just to grab groceries. But take the time to get a nice shirt that isn't a Hanes. Hanes are for like, cleaning the house with no bra on, not for venturing out into the world. Anyways, I always find great everyday stuff over at the Aero.



Forever21 - Best For: Accessories

You all know my never ending love for Forever 21. I just think it's a versatile store and it's pretty much impossible to NOT find something there. Yeah, a lot of the clothes are made for teeny boppers. I absolutely do not want to see you in neon orange jeans. But A pinstripe skirt? Yes, please. However, even better than cheap F21 clothes? Cheap, massive amounts of F21 accessories. Their accesories department is my happy place. Rarely is anything over $7, so I always walk out of there with like, 19 rings, 8 pairs of earrings and 12 necklaces, I kid you not. It's awesome. I think that with accessories, you have a few key expensive pieces, and then you change up the look with cheapos. Love.



Nordstrom - Best For: Cosmetics

Now, I'm not saying buy all of your make up at Norstrom. That would be crazy expensive. However, some things are worth spending money on. Think of the one type of cosmetic that you value the most. For me, it's mascara. Like, I LOVE mascara. Love it. So I pony up and buy my Diorshow at Nordstrom. However, even if you aren't thinking of purchasing your entire bag of cosmetics from there, you can try on colors at the counter. You'll probably be talked into buying something, but it's amazing what a little status lipstick can do. It might be intimidating at first to walk up and be like hey, slap some make up on me. But the ladies do it AAALLLLL the time, and you're just another face to them. So go!



Gap - Best For: Basics and Jeans

Gap, hands down, has the best fitting plain tees and tanks in the biz. I mean, if you're going to wear a plain old tee anyway, choose one that fits perfectly and then you can look like its on purpose. Also, their new line of jeans is ah-mazing! The curvy ones are pretty much perfection. Again, remember all of the rules for jeans; grab some with a little stretch, go up a size if you need to, so on and so forth.



White House Black Market - Best For: Dresses

If you're on the hunt for the perfect dress (like I was all summer long, more on this to follow) then definitely put WHBM on your list. Their dresses are awesome, and made to fit an actual woman's (read: not girl's) body. Yes, they are slightly pricier than other places, but dresses are meant to fit flawlessly. And remember, since they are replacing both a shirt and pants, they'll probably cost about the same. Invest in a dress that makes your body look amazing, and you'll never regret the money spent. You can take that to the bank. K, I've just always wanted to say that. Moving on.



Torrid - Best For: Plus Sizes

Plus size girls. GO TO THIS STORE. Not only do they carry awesome clothes that are actually CURRENT, but amazing shoes that I covet. It is so much better than your scary frump alternatives like, CJ Banks *shudder*. Lane Bryant is a good enough compromise if you feel like Torrid's clothes are a little out there for you, but personally, I love how confident their clothes are. So unapologetic and it makes me happy.



Cinnabon - Best For: Gracelessly Pigging Out until I Feel Bad About Myself and Leave the Mall

Just make this your last stop, k? 'Nuff said.

So head to the mall and hit some tried and true places that you KNOW won't make you leave in a frustrated huff because you can't find ANYTHING. Your favorites won't fail you. They'll keep you safe and warm. Also, I want a Cinnabon now.

My wallet may be empty but my closet is full...

Sooo I went shopping this weekend. Every few months I break down and do a big fat shop where I go a little out of control. I contend that it is good for the soul. And seriously, can we say Memorial Day Sale?

Anyways, I got some amazing deals so I thought I'd share them on here. I guess its my equivalent of coming home with all of my shopping bags and saying "OMG, you HAVE to see what I got."



Easily my best find of the weekend. Large Guess bag, originally $90, on sale for $35. WOO! I was looking for a large, multipurpose bag that could double as a diaper bag, but would still be awesome for just going out. I was using a Guess satchel as my every day bag, bug the shape was bothering me. Anyways, I LOVE THIS to an inordinate degree, and even my husband agreed that it was a good one. And he hates me spending money, so that's a big deal.





This Banana Republic shirt. I love Banana Republic for really classic business-casual wear, and this shirt will look awesome with some long dark jeans and a point heel. Because of the awesome neckline, it'll only need earrings to accesorize. I love things that make outfits effortless.



I have a bad habit of finding something I like, and then buying it in like 4 different colors. I love this Old Navy shirt. The way it fits is awesome, it has an interesting braided neckline so it isn't boring. Its perfect for everyday, grocery shopping, carpooling days.



How killer are these shoes? Originally $60, I scored them for $20. I love snakeskin on shoes, its much more understated than say, a leopard print, and it works like a neutral. Plus, a wedge is so EASY. Can't wait to try these with a summer skirt or skinny jeans.



Love these flat disc earrings. I cut my hair shorter, (I have a rule: if I find myself putting my hair in a pony like, 4 out of 5 days, my hair gets cut.) and I love wearing awesome earring with short hair. These are fun enough to wear casually, but get dressed up easily too.


So that was my shopping trip. Well, I also bought some stuff for my husband and kids, but you don't really need to see all that. And a pretzel. Can't go shopping without a pretzel, unless of course there is a Cinnabon in the vicinity.


So how about you? Score any good finds lately?

Saley Sale Sale

So I know its been like, a MONTH since I posted last but I'm in the hospital and super uninspired by the fashion choices here. You can hear about my pajama pants, or my take on scrubs, but neither one sound good to me.

Anyways, just popping on to say that one of my favourite stores, EXPRESS, is having a big box sale, with everything 40% the posted price. Whee. Let me tell you, remember when we talked about not looking crappy when running errands and stuff? Their featherweight tees are THE BEST for just being casual but still looking cute. Come to think of it, I am wearing an EXPRESS shirt right now. They are super long, which I love, and actually fit over my belly with their extreme perfect fittedness. Something like this is pretty adorable for every day. And they are like $5 right now. So enjoy the sale, and know that though I am bed ridden, I am still looking out for your fashion well being. If that doesn't warm your cold little hearts, I don't know what will.

The Beauty of Online Shopping

So I got a comment on my last post about online shopping, and I thought NEAT! I shall write a post about it.

I am a die-hard online shopper. I really think its because I am a die-hard in real life shopper, but sometimes I just can't get out for whatever reason, and browsing along online is the next best thing. And I am the queen of adding to my cart and not buying things. But I think it's just like real shopping... you grab stuff that you think you'll love, and then five minutes after wandering around the store, you're like "I really don't love this!" And hang it back discreetly on some other rack. At least with online shopping, you don't have to worry about getting in trouble when you put it back where it doesn't belong.

Anyhow, through all my years of online shopping, I've picked up some tips and tricks and stuff to help me along. I HATE HATE HATE sending stuff back, so if I buy something, it's at my house for good. I still have a pair of pants I ordered like, two years ago that never fit and I just gave them to the DI, tags still on. Terrible. So when I order stuff, it's there for good.

First, sizing. I would recommend that for now, if you're a newbie, you try online shopping at stores that you frequent in real life. For instance, lets take Old Navy. I shop at Old Navy allllll the time at the brick and mortar store. So I am super familiar with their sizing. When I order online, I have no guesses on whether or not something looks good.

When you go to a brick and mortar store that you LOVE, take note of your sizing information. I actually keep a little note of all the stores and what size I am in each one. Then you can look online for awesome sales. I like online sales, because whereas the actual brick and mortar store is clearancing out their excess and leftover inventory for that location, the online store is clearancing out a ton of warehouses, and you can get sweet deals.

Also, internet shopping is NOT THE TIME to try new fads and trends. One time, like five years ago when those Kangol hats were in, I convinced myself that I would look awesome in one and ordered one online. It looked teerrrrrrrrible. You don't even know how bad. It was too big for my face or something... whatever. What I'm saying is, internet shopping is not for "trying" stuff out. But things in styles you know you look good in and love, and there is no guess work. I sold the hat on eBay.

Last, there is one department where you can go crazy online shopping, and that's with shoes. Because shoes always look good. Unless it's a pair of boots that you don't know if they'll fit over your calves, buy as many pairs of pumps as humanly possible online. I would say 2/3rds of my collection are online purchases. A word to the wise though, if you are ordering pumps, order a half size up. Just trust me and your tootsies will thank me.

So, that's the rundown. No go! Go my lovelies! Buy things!!!

Shopping Tips

Sometimes I hear people say tings like "I hate shopping!" This. Is. Unacceptable. I'm not saying everyone has to be like me, the die-hard shopper that lives, eats and sleeps it, but it should be a pretty enjoyable experience. After all, you're out there BUYING thins for YOURSELF. How do you not enjoy that? I'm sorry, we probably can't be friends.

I have some ideas that can make shopping a little easier on both the feet and the pocketbook. One day, you shall be a shopping lover, and I will you see you twirling your shopping bags in circles and throwing your hat up in the air Mary Tyler Moore style in the mall. We'll get there, I promise. This is on my mind especially because I am FINALLY going to buy some of those cute academy sweaters today. I can't believe I have put it off this long. Must have one! K, so here we go.

-SHOES! Put some thought into the shoes you wear shopping. I know you're automatically thinking comfort, but please! before you pull out your perfectly white Keds, remember the purpose of trying on these clothes is to make sure they look good. You will not be happy if you go to try on a cute skirt with clunky old running shoes. *shudder* My advice is to shop in flats. They look good with pretty much any type of clothing, and will give you a better idea of how the clothes will look and not leave you frustrated. Trying on jeans? Remember that there are different length inseams. I get longer jeans to wear with my heels and shorter jeans to wear wit flats. When trying on long jeans for heels, do a little tippy toe test (stand on your toes about three inches in the air) and make sure they'll fall correctly....and that your butt looks good. Go ahead, give it a little peek.

- Wear something presentable. Remember that there will be other people shopping, and you'll feel all frumpy and unrepresentable if you head out in sweats and mom jeans.

- Do not bring children if you are serious about shopping for yourself. Don't get me wrong, I nip into stores with my two year old all the time, but I don't do real shopping with her. You'll get too frustrated and then tell me you hate shopping. And that will make me cry.

- STAY OUT OF CHILDREN'S STORES. If you are going shopping for yourself, stay away from the dang Gymboree stuff. I know there might be a sale, but you'll go in, drop a small fortune on weirdly coordinated apple clothing, and then feel guilty when you walk into an adult store because all of your money is gone. This is for you.

- Set a spending limit. It'll stop that awful buyer's remorse I used to get all the time (now I have no remorse. HA! Yes, I'll be here all week. Tip your waitress.) If you only want to spend $20 on a top, weed them out accordingly. Trust me, there are many tops in the proverbial sea. That $35 one does not need to belong to you if it does not belong in the budget. Good deals are to be found!!

- Eat something!! If you're in a mall, grab a pretzel and something with a little bit of protein so you're not all rainy-day-susan. Alot of time we're just rushing around and forget about it. Grab a smoothie and you can sip and shop. You'll have a better time, trust me.

K, that should be it for now. I use shopping as my 'me' time. At least once a month, I pass the duties off to my husband, kiss him and the baby goodbye, and head out on my own for a few hours. Not only is it because I love shopping, but I also love ADULT time, when the old Jae shakes off the dust and comes out to play, umbrella stroller not included. Remember when YOU were an adult? That was fun, wasn't it? Doing big people things! So try it, for yourself, just once, and tell me I totally haven't changed your opinion on the big 'S'. (That's shopping, not smoothie, although I could use a Mango-a-go-go today...)

Splurge or Steal?

So I read alot of magazines, my favourite being Glamour and Marie Claire, and my most hated being Cosmopolitan. Don't get me wrong, I still buy it, I just get annoying easily. K WE GET IT, YOU LIKE SEX. But really, how many times can you read an article about "New Tricks He'll CRAVE" without it getting a little redundant? Do you hear me Cosmo??? I think you're redundant!! As if they don't already know.

Anyhow, they all in some way or another do the splurge vs. steal articles where they feature a "must have" item and then show it in some ridiculously expensive designer version, and then the lowly budget version for the masses. K, can I first go off on a total tangent about "Must haves"? I don't believe in them. I don't believe in thinking "omg, that's going to be so HOT right now" and running out and buying it. Yes, I take a look at collections for each season, but the thing is, there are only two types of clothes: Those that look good on you, and those that don't. This is completely regardless of the season, or what the celebs are wearing, etc, etc. Because it is just you and the mirror. So if someone tells you that something is so "in style" right now, ask them first "Have you actually tried it on??" Because anyone can look in a magazine and quote it back to you.

K, Rant over. ANYWAYS. Splurge vs Steal. Let's take a look at some essential wardrobe pieces, and I'll let you know if this is something you can skimp on, or something you should spend some cash on. Don't tell my husband, he thinks everything in my closet was a steal. Ha!

Pants/Trousers: You need one pair of tailored trousers that first and foremost, make your derriere look fantastic. They should be long enough to wear with heels, in a neutral (Black, brown, navy etc). Other than that, you can be frugal with your other pants.

Jeans: Steal. I have very expensive Seven jeans and very cheap no-name jeans, and I pretty much wear them all the same. Just try alot on, buy whichever makes you look the best. I don't think you need to spend that much. One of my favourite pairs I literally got for $10 at Macy's while shopping with some friends.

Tops: Steal, steal, steal. Don't spend alot of money on tops. Especially trendy ones, Try Forever 21 or something first, they probably have whatever you was for like $12, and then if you didn't listen to me about the "so hot right now" stuff, you won't feel like an idiot when no one is wearing neon studded tees anymore and can rest easy knowing you didn't pay that much for it. Spend only if it is a special occasion.

Shoes: Splurge. Just on two very good pairs. 1) A GOOD pair of boots. I bought my favourite pair FOUR years ago and they are just classic and perfect season after season. I then found good deals on trendier boots, slouchy ones or python ones that won't be appropriate forever and ever. Then, splurge on one amazing -and I mean amazing- pair of heels. I splurged a while back on these Michael Kors pumps.

They will last forever because of their classic styling and always look good. ANd they are COMFY. Then save when you buy every other little shoe your heart desires. I like http://www.shoeocean.com/ and http://www.gojane.com/ for cute shoes that won't break the bank.

Jackets: Steal. I am easily the worst jacket-addict ever. I have SO many because they are such a good way to finish an outfit. Like, you know when you're standing there in front of the mirror wondering what to do because your outfit isn't quite "there" yet? Add a jacket. I find them all over, you shouldn't have to pay more than say, $40 for a fun one. I got an amazing corduroy bomber from Steve & Barry's for $8. And Ross always has cute ones. I just bought this one over the weekend. $34 for a biker jacket? LOVE. Buy alot.

Accessories: This can be tricky. I love me some expensive jewelry. However, I think it's best to buy up fun pieces for cheap, and then get your most serious pieces as splurges. I am SUPER fickle with jewelry. I have three pieces that I wear constantly, and then my other stuff I tend to forget I have and leave it to get dusty in y jewelry box. I forget my ears are pierced ALLL the time. So I buy stuff for cheap, knowing full well I'll probably lose it. However, I have this watch:

It's a serious piece. My husband bought it for me after secretly working on some overtime stuff. Honestly, if the house was burning down, screw the family albums, I am grabbing my watch. I wanted it for MONTHS before I got it. That's when it's totally okay to splurge. That, and my wedding set, plus my grandmother's wedding set that I had redone, and that is the extent of my expensive jewelry. Anything else was probably under $15.

K, so hopefully that will help you sleep at night. Truth is, you never ever have to spend alot of money to look good. I kid you not, when we were newlyweds, I was restricted to a $22 a month shopping budget. $22!!!!! But I made it work and usually had new clothes. No one will ever know, except you, and then you can just feels smug against all of the fashionista's out there who didn't even have to WORK to get that stuff. Anyone can walk into Saks and buy something that they saw in a magazine, but being creative and doing your homework to find a better deal is so much more satisfying.... in your FACE, 5th Ave!